SERIES/UNIVERSE: SG-7
DISCLAIMERS: M7 characters belong to Trilogy, et al, SG-1 characters belong to Gekko, MGM, and Showtime. Original characters (mainly Adriana in this story, though others are mentioned) are all mine ... don't mind if you borrow them, just ask first, give them back intact and give credit where credit is due. Mindy belongs to herself and my neighbors, though she still thinks my family an ... elong to her.
SPOILERS: For Mag7, all twenty-one episodes are fair game, along with my previous stories, More than Friends, A Light in the Distance, Under the Sun, Days of Yearning, Sun, Fun, and Ezra on the Run, Full Circle, and Open House; also all five seasons of Stargate SG-1.
WARNING: The usual, violence and language. Quite possibly the most smarmy story I've ever written, but I'll try to keep it from becoming too syrupy.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I've been wanting to write a story for some time about Vin as a child, but every time I thought I had something, I'd come across someone who had used it. And then, the Gou'ald, for once, came to my rescue. Imagine that.
Just as an fyi ... this series, this universe, ignores the events of the latter fifth season of Stargate SG-1. Specifically, Meridian and Revelation. Which also gets rid of Jonas Quinn in sixth season.
Josephine Tanner was looking forward to getting home. She was looking forward to sleeping in her own bed, and to being around adults. In the last week, while she was helping Elizabeth pack up her dorm room, Josie had realized ... she had gotten old. Elizabeth's friends were nice enough, but they were all so young. True enough, Elizabeth's older brother was twenty-seven, only eight years older ... but sometimes, those eight years could be an eternity.
Even if you didn't grow up fast, as Vin did. That was another reason Josie was anxious to get home. She wanted to see Vin, wanted to see how his first mission went. Before she left to collect her daughter, Vin called her and told her that he was cleared to return to work. He was so excited! Unspoken was another reason for his excitement, but Josie knew about it anyhow. Josiah had told her.
There were actually two reasons. One, Christmas was rapidly approaching, and Carly would be home. And two ... two, the walls around Adriana's heart were quickly crumbling. Josiah thought it was only a matter of time before the pair finally did something about the passion which had been simmering between them for eight long years. And Josie couldn't have been happier for her nephew.
He deserved this ... deserved to finally have someone who loved him without reservation. Josie sensed that was part of the reason things took this long between Vin and Drina. Like Josie herself, Drina believed that Vin should have someone who could love him without reservation. And while Drina did love him, had loved him for a very long time ... she had to hold back. At least, until now. She was a good girl, would take good care of Vin. Josie had faith in the young archaeologist, even if both Jessica and their father were still making up their mind about her. Although, Josie thought Jessica was still smarting from Adriana's tongue lashing.
Elizabeth had fallen silent at Josie's side, and at first, Josie thought her daughter had fallen asleep. But no, Elizabeth's eyes were wide open, and she was staring out the window. After several moments, Josie asked softly, "Something on your mind, honey?" Elizabeth nodded, and Josie said nothing more, waiting for her daughter to continue. Like her two brothers, Elizabeth sometimes took time to formulate what she wanted to say.
"I was just thinking about Vin. You know, my roommates were really surprised when they found out I had two brothers. I only told them about Carly, 'cause ... I don't know. Anyhow, one of them kinda got an attitude when I told them that Chris was in the military, and that Vin used to be a bounty hunter. I wanted to smack her, Mom. Vin did the best he could, with the education he got ... what was he supposed to do?" Elizabeth asked, her voice cracking.
Josie looked at her daughter, concerned, but Elizabeth continued, "I mean, come on! She comes from a good family, she lived in one place her entire life, and she's always gotten good grades. Who does she think she is, judging Vin? She told me he looked like a scruffy, no-good tramp. He does not! Yeah, he's scruffy, but he's cute that way. And he's a good person. Who does she think she is? She acts like ... like the sperm donor!"
Elizabeth was nineteen years old, on the verge of becoming a woman ... but there were times when she reminded Josie that in some ways, she was still very young. Josie kept one hand on the steering wheel and reached over to take Elizabeth's with the other. She said softly as Elizabeth's fingers closed around hers, "Honey, there are some people like that. Okay, maybe Vin had other options open to him. But if he didn't know them, then they weren't of any use to him."
She took a deep breath, then continued, "We know the truth about Vin. We know he's a loving, generous, brave young man, who has risked his life, time after time, to save others. We know he's special, and always has been. We know that he's very, very smart ... and even though he sometimes talks as if he's uneducated, we know better. The people who know him, who work with him, who love him ... we're the important ones. Not Pauline."
Elizabeth looked at her quickly, asking, "I didn't say it was Pauline." Josie grinned. She didn't have to. She knew both of her daughter's roommates. Pauline was the only one who would have derided Vin. Galina was the daughter of Russian immigrants ... defectors ... whatever you wanted to call them. They started over again in the United States with nothing, and worked as every immigrant family had from the beginning of this country.
Galina, unlike Pauline, would understand about sacrifices and choices. Josie had often spoke with the young Russian-American girl while waiting for her daughter to finish packing, and Galina told her of the sacrifices which her own parents had made, so Galina could go to college. Pauline was actually a decent person, but she was incapable of looking past herself and her own experiences. Even when they got shoved in her face.
That sounded odd to anyone else, but Josie had learned the hard way that there were some people who, while they were good at heart, didn't understand something, no matter how many times they were hit with reality.
Still, Josie never told her daughter to move out. Elizabeth was young, and just now starting to see the real Pauline. And she had to understand there were people like that in the world. Her daughter said now, softly, "I just ... she made me angry. And she couldn't understand why I was so angry. Vin's my brother, Mom! He's my brother, and I love him. Why should I let her talk bad about him, just because she thinks the world revolves around her?"
Ahhh, now they were hearing the real reason Elizabeth had gotten so quiet. She had been thinking about the confrontation with Pauline ... and getting angry all over again. Elizabeth Madeline Tanner lived by very simple rules. You didn't harm one of hers ... and you didn't badmouth her family. Pauline had done just that. And up until this incident, Elizabeth had been one of her most staunch protectors.
Elizabeth had been forced to see Pauline in a totally different light. No longer was she the friend who loaned Elizabeth her own clothing when she had nothing that looked right ... now, she was someone who had maligned Elizabeth's brother, and that changed everything. Right or wrong, it changed everything. Josie replied, choosing her words very carefully, "Pauline is the same person she's been all along, honey. It's you who has changed."
There was another long silence from her daughter, then Elizabeth answered very softly, "I know that. And I'm angry with myself, for being angry with her, for being herself. If that makes any sense. It's just ... it makes me mad, Mom. Pauline makes me mad, and it makes me mad that Vin had to grow up the way he did. He always said that no one mistreated him ... but nobody loved him, either. Everyone should have someone to love them."
"Yes, they should," Josie agreed. Elizabeth made herself smaller in the car, as if she was cold, but Josie knew that wasn't the real reason. After a moment, the mother said softly, "Listen, honey ... you had nothing to do with what happened to Vin. Okay? You weren't even born when this whole mess started. You've done nothing wrong, there is no reason for you to feel guilty. It was simply ... it wasn't your fault."
"I know, Mom," came the miserable answer, "but it still hurts. I looked at those pictures, the ones you sent to Pegeen. And it hurts. That little boy should have been with his gramma and grandpa ... he should have been with his aunt and his sisters, and his brother. He shouldn't have had to grow up alone. Unloved. Unwanted. No child ever should." Josie squeezed her hand again, then returned both hands to the steering wheel.
"No, honey, they shouldn't ... there was nothing you could have done for Vin. So my question to you, Elizabeth, is ... what are you gonna do? What can you do, to keep another child from growing up unloved and unwanted?" the former soldier asked. Her eyes flickered to the side of the road. They were getting closer to their destination. She would be home in a little less than two hours ... she couldn't wait to surprise Josiah!
"Well, for one things, I can keep the guys out of my pants. Sheesh! They think they're so smart, but I knew better! I won't be someone who gets used and thrown away. I don't need a man to be happy!" came the firm answer. Josie grinned, hearing herself in that declaration.
Elizabeth continued, "Galina and I have been talking ... we're thinking about becoming Big Sisters. That's a way to make sure a kid doesn't grow up unloved or unwanted, isn't it? I mean, I could adopt a kid, when I get older, like you did. Galina told me that her mom and dad are looking into adopting, see if they can adopt an older child. You think they'll be able to, being from another country and all?"
"I don't see why not, honey, but I'm not a social worker," Josie replied. Elizabeth nodded absently, her mind zipping along at the speed of light. God, Josie was so proud of her daughter! But the former soldier had one other thing to say to this girl who was her greatest accomplishment, "Just make sure, honey, that you're doing it for the right reason. Much as we want to, we can't turn back time. Vin is a grown man now, not a child." Elizabeth simply nodded with a sigh.
Elizabeth and Josephine Tanner weren't the only ones on the road that evening. Nathan Jackson had been released from duty, and now he was returning home. Nathan was slated to head out with SG-4, but the team's medic was allowed to return to duty. So, he was free for the next few days, and he planned to spend it with Rain. Maybe go to the store the following day and pick up some crayons and coloring books for the little boy.
Nathan couldn't think of him as Vin. And yet, he knew that it was Vin. Janet's tests had proved that ... the DNA which came from that child belonged to Vin Tanner. But it wasn't the Vin Tanner he had known for the last three years. No, this was Vin Tanner as he was a long, long time ago. And Nathan had no idea how to react to him. No idea how to approach him, how to speak to him.
Nathan had no problem talking to children ... hell, he loved the little rugrats. And maybe if he had known Vin Tanner when he was five, this wouldn't be quite so hard. But he hadn't known Vin all those years ago, he only knew Vin as an adult. He really didn't hear that many stories about Vin as a child, not even from Josie Tanner when she was around. Carly didn't meet him until they were nineteen.
So, in a way, Nathan felt as if he was violating Vin's privacy, by seeing him this young ... and this fragile. Vin never talked about his childhood, probably for good reason. And during the last three years, Vin's friendship and quiet support had come to mean everything to Nathan. The medic didn't want to lose that, for any reason. He didn't ever want Vin to feel uncomfortable with him, and he was afraid that was exactly what would happen once Vin returned to being an adult. Nathan couldn't allow himself to think they wouldn't get their Vin back. That simply wasn't ... he wouldn't allow himself to think that was even a possibility.
The medic sighed, rolling his head from side to side, even as he kept his eyes on the road. He was looking forward to getting home and holding Rain. Maybe she could help him make sense out of the crazy feelings he was having ... swinging back and forth between compassion for that lost child, fear that what he learned now from the child-Vin would create problems with the adult-Vin, and guilt that he would even consider shutting out a child in need.
It hadn't escaped his notice that JD was having a hard time with this as well. The youngster had made himself scarce after Buck, Ezra, and Josiah decided they were going to the toy store for the little guy. Nathan felt a smile lifting the corners of his mouth, even as he flicked on his turn signal to turn onto his street. In some ways, those three were just big kids. Buck and Ezra, he had always known about, but Josiah had been the surprise.
Maybe it was Josie's influence, maybe it was simply a lost child who touched Josiah's heart. Nathan didn't know. He was glad his best friend could be there for the little boy, even though Nathan himself couldn't. Not yet at least, not until he got himself under control. Not until he knew what was wrong with him. And not until Nathan stopped wanting to put his fist through a wall, every time he saw the look of fear in that little boy's eyes.
Nathan could never remember being truly afraid until his mother was raped and murdered, when he was seven. And that was still too young, to be that afraid. Children that age shouldn't have to be afraid, for any reason. But it was becoming increasingly clear that even months after his mother's death, Vin learned to be wary of predators. That was wrong. That was so wrong. And goddammit, it hurt, seeing that fear in Vin's eyes when he looked at all of them. When he looked at Nathan.
Vin had never been afraid of any of them. Not Chris with his simmering temper, or Josiah with his strength ... strong enough to break Nathan's back, and both men knew it. Vin wasn't afraid of Nathan's equally destructive anger, or Buck's flashes of rage. He wasn't afraid of any of them, not even the men who were bigger than he was. And to see that fear in his eyes, when he looked at them ...
Dammit, it hurt! And Nathan hated himself all over again, even though he kept his distance from the child ... because one thing he learned as a child. The best way to face your fear is to confront it. This child-Vin would never stop being afraid of him, as long as Nathan wasn't around him. And the medic knew that. He kept reminding himself, so he wouldn't forget it, so he wouldn't just give up and walk away from that little boy for good. But every time he would find the courage to reach out to the child ...
An image of the adult Vin would flash through his mind ... the expression in Vin's eyes when someone dug too deep into his past. When Buck or JD asked him a question about elementary school or something, a question of any kind about his past before he was ready to talk about that particular incident. Usually, something they found out about by accident, and JD shot his mouth off. It wasn't that he didn't trust them. But there were some things which Vin didn't want to talk about. He would tell them about his adult past, especially if there was a chance a skip came after him for revenge. But those years before he turned sixteen ...
He just didn't like talking about that, and Nathan respected that. He preferred not to talk about the year immediately following his mother's death. And the all-too-empathic medic had only to imagine himself in that situation. Changed into a seven year old boy, in the weeks and months after his mother's death. Scared, angry, grieving. So terribly angry. And Nathan wasn't sure if he wanted that part of him seen.
And then ... to return to being an adult, and know that your friends saw you that helpless, that vulnerable ... that much of a child. It hurt to even think about, and Nathan worked for too many years to maintain those protective shields around his heart. So, no. No, he couldn't take that from Vin. He would do what he could for the little boy, he would bring him crayons and coloring books.
But he would not take any secrets from him. It was the only way Nathan knew to protect both the child and adult Vin. While Nathan knew the rest of SG-7 and SG-1 would never do anything to hurt the boy, there were others in the SGC who might see this as the perfect opportunity to put that uppity tracker in his place. And Nathan realized, as he turned off the engine of his car, that his anger with SG-1 was finally dying away, but with it came new guilt.
He couldn't blame them for what happened to Vin, much as he wanted to ... much as they all wanted to. Nathan knew the members of SG-1 would lay down their lives for the Texan, just as the members of SG-7 would. And he knew that if it had been possible, one of them would have traded places with Vin. There was nothing they could have done in this situation, aside from not go to the planet in the first place.
They had no way of knowing what that machine could do ... that was what Major Carter was trying to do. Trying to figure out what the machine's purpose was. They had no way of knowing it was about to malfunction. There was nothing anyone could have done ... and the only people truly at fault were the Gou'ald. Nathan would tell them that, too. In the morning. Right now, he needed Rain.
Nothing else. He just needed her to hold him. That was all he needed ... besides, while Rain's pregnancy wasn't that advanced, Nathan didn't want to take any chances. Not with Rain, and not with the baby.
He turned off the lights and removed the keys from the ignition, making sure all the doors were locked, then headed into the house. Strange. He knew he left his house early that morning, but right now, it felt more like he had been away for a week. A lot had happened today. The light came on and Rain appeared first at the door, then on the porch. He gave her a weary smile, trudging up the walkway.
Neither spoke. Rain simply reached out her arms and enfolded him in a fierce embrace. Gratefully, Nathan dropped his head until it rested against her shoulder. Rain whispered, "General Hammond called me a half hour, when you left the SGC. He told me what happened to Vin. Is there anything I can do to help, Nathan? Anything at all?" General Hammond had called Rain. Told her what happened.
"Hold me," he whispered, "that's all." Rain just tightened her arms around him, and Nathan whispered, "He don't know us, Rain. None of us. He's afraid of us. Vin Tanner, who ain't afraid of nobody or nothin.' He's so damn little. Just a baby himself." Just as Nathan himself was when his mother was killed ... just a baby. And what hurt most, more than anything else, even the fear ... was Nathan's wish that he had been regressed, instead of Vin.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: In the last half of season five of Stargate SG-1, there was an episode involving several cadets on a training mission. So, while it's highly unlikely that a nineteen year old college student would know about the Stargate program, even with Elizabeth's background, it's not unfeasible by the show's standards. Just call it me extending my own dramatic license.
It was getting late. And as much as Josie Tanner wanted to see both her nephew and her man tonight, as much as she wanted to talk to Vin ... she was tired. Her daughter was tired. They were both too tired to navigate the hallways to their bedrooms, much less talk on the phone, so Josie parked her daughter on the sofa, while she herself took the recliner. It brought back memories ... camping in the front room when Elizabeth was ten, after they were rained out.
Elizabeth asked sleepily as Josie turned on the tv, "Ask you a question, Mom?" Josie looked at her daughter, and the girl continued, "If the Stargate project is under Air Force supervision, how come there's Army personnel?" Josie sighed, linking her hands behind her head. Her daughter found out about the Stargate program because Orrin Travis told her. It was a top secret project, but her old friend told the nineteen year old college sophomore about it. Because both of her older brothers were in the program, as was her older sister, or maybe it was because Elizabeth planned to go into the Air Force after college, and Orrin was already recruiting her?
That was the most likely possibility. Orrin was always looking for new talent, especially after the success of a young Air Force cadet, and with Evan Larabee's other children already in the program, it made sense to recruit the youngest member of the Tanner family. However, that youngest member had not learned the patience of her older brother (Vin), and she was not so patiently waiting for Josie's answer. This was one area where she was definitely more like Chris or Carly.
The former Army sergeant replied, "It started out that way ... but once they realized just what the Earth was up against with the Gou'ald, the SGC encompassed the Army as well, and JD Dunne was the first of the Army personnel to arrive. You gotta admit, defending the planet isn't the area of just one branch of the service. It isn't even just for one country, but the United States and Russia are the only countries with Stargates."
She paused, adjusting her position in her recliner, and added, "Besides. Once the Secretary of the Army found out about this project, did you really think the Army would be kept out of this?" There was an answering giggle from her daughter, and Josie grinned in the darkness, then continued, "Anyhow, since they knew each other so well in the past, the Army assigned Orrin to be the Army liaison to the SGC."
Elizabeth was silent for a long time, then asked, "Mom?" Josie hummed a 'yes,' and Elizabeth continued, "Morgana moved out a few weeks before the end of the term. I think Pauline said something to her. I hadn't thought of it before, not until Pauline put down Vin and Chris, but I think that's what happened." Josie's eyes flew open at that. Morgana had been the other roommate, a military brat.
And she was also Elizabeth's closest friend among her three roommates. Like her two older brothers (and older sister), Elizabeth was highly protective of her little circle. It wasn't important, whether or not Morgana needed her protection. Just as it wasn't important whether or not the people whom Vin loved needed his protection. He took care of them, to the best of his ability. Josie often wondered why the three siblings ... no, four ... were so alike, when they were all raised by different people.
Then again ... she had to look at who actually raised the four children. Chris was raised primarily by his mother, who should have been a Tanner. Vin was raised by Julia ... Elizabeth by Josie ... and while Carly lived with Jessica and David, it was Parris and Clarice Tanner who raised her. Of course the four siblings were so similar. Even though they were raised separately, there was that common bond.
And then Elizabeth was talking again, drawing Josie's attention back to her daughter. The girl said softly, "I can't think of anything else it would be. And Morgana would just quietly leave, rather than possibly create problems for the rest of us. I mean, all of her classes are finished for the year, but I thought she trusted me enough to say something if her father was being transferred." Josie sat up, all thoughts of sleep eradicated. At least for the moment.
Her daughter was genuinely worried about Morgana. This was only vaguely about Pauline. Yes, Elizabeth was angry with Pauline for the things which she said about Elizabeth's brothers, but more to the point, she was afraid that Pauline had driven one of her best friends away ... and she was just now starting to realize that Pauline wasn't who she thought she was. Which meant, Elizabeth's next step would be, worrying about whether or not she could have foreseen this ... and headed it off.
Josie said softly, "Sweetheart, listen to me. You are not responsible for what Morgana and Pauline do. You are not responsible for their fights or their problems. You are not responsible for making sure they work out those problems. You are responsible only for your own interactions with them. You are not their mother or their older sister, you are not the dorm floor leader. You're just like Vin in that respect."
A golden head was lifted from the pillow and Elizabeth asked hoarsely, "What do you mean?" There was no defensiveness in her voice. Just simple curiosity, trying to understand what her mother was saying. Josie sighed, shifting in the recliner. She thought longingly about calling Josiah, until she saw the time. It was way past midnight. No, she wouldn't risk calling him, not until the morning at least. Besides, she was afraid if she did call him, she wouldn't be especially coherent during their conversation. For Josie, getting her tired was just as potent as getting her drunk. Maybe even more so.
"I mean, honey, that Vin often blamed himself for things he couldn't control. Which is very endearing in some ways, but the problem is, when you do that ... the people who are truly responsible for that situation never learn, because no one has ever held them accountable. Like..." Josie paused. She tried to remember if Elizabeth knew about Buck and Adriana's father. She couldn't remember if that had ever been brought up in the time Elizabeth was here before returning to college.
Mentally apologizing to her nephew's girlfriend if she didn't want Elizabeth to know, Josie continued, "It's like the situation with Vin and Adriana. For years and years, Vin blamed himself for leaving Texas the way he did ... even though, if he had said good-bye to Adriana in person, Eli Joe would have realized what she meant to him. And he would have used that ... he would have used Adriana to hurt Vin. The same is true of Buck and Adriana's father. For so long, Adriana blamed herself for what their father did to her. But the people ultimately responsible ... were Eli Joe and Avery Wilmington. No one else."
There was a long silence as Elizabeth turned this over in her mind. Then, she finally asked softly, "Mom? Is this like Chris blaming himself for Sarah and Adam's deaths, even though Colonel Gaines and Cletus Fowler were the ones who caused it?" Josie released a breath she didn't realize she was holding. Yes. Her daughter did understand. The question was, would she be able to move forward.
That, Josie knew, was the hardest thing of all. Letting go of responsibility that was never yours to take in the first place. Letting go of anything. Whether it was of your child, of guilt ... or of anything else. Elizabeth continued, sounding as if she was feeling her way through a maze with the tips of her fingers and nothing else, "And this is like when you chewed out someone's six for busting on Chris, for making Nathan and Ezra work things out themselves."
Josie barely managed to hold back a laugh, remembering the incident in question. Someone thought it was the colonel's job to nursemaid his two men when they were bickering. The trouble was, the bickering constituted part of their relationship, it was part of how they told each other how much they cared about each other. Josie had only sisters growing up, but she saw it in the military ... and from her father's stories about growing up.
Looking back now, Josie wondered if the well-meaning, but ultimately clueless, civilian had any idea just how stupid she sounded. Doubtful. The only time you interfered in the personal relationship between two members of your personnel was when it endangered their lives, or the lives of others in the unit, when it threatened the mission. Nathan and Ezra didn't allow it to get to that point. Probably because someone ... her guess would be Orrin or George ... told them early on to work the problems out, and move on.
But Elizabeth wasn't done yet. She continued, "And that's why Carly always told me to stay out of it, when Vin and Chris argued while Vin was recovering." Again, Josie nodded ... on the other hand, that was only part of the story in that situation. She adjusted her position in the recliner once more, grimacing. She really was getting too old to be sleeping in recliners. Unless she was also in Josiah's arms.
"There's something else," Josie told her daughter, "when you interfere in something like that, it doesn't allow you to keep the lines of communication open with everyone. You interfere, you take sides. You take sides, someone is gonna feel like they can't go to you. And it snowballs. You can't make someone be something they aren't, honey. And if you really love them, you shouldn't even try."
There was another long silence, then Elizabeth sighed, "Which is also why you tell me that I should help little kids because I want to help them, not for Vin's sake, because he's a grown man and not a little kid." Josie grinned ... exactly! Elizabeth gave another sigh, then murmured, "Night, Mom." Josie whispered a 'night, baby,' and her daughter fell silent after that. However, Josie lay awake for a few minutes more.
She thought about the conversation she just had with her daughter, and quietly sighed. Josie knew herself to be a hypocrite, because there had been many times when she wished she could turn back time ... left the military and gone to Texas to raise her nephew. But, that wouldn't happen. Besides, Josie thought sleepily as she finally dropped off, be careful what you wish for ... you might just get it!
It was strange for Kevin, to wake up without any sunlight. It was stranger still to wake up on the cot, and find himself surrounded by men, all of whom were asleep. The five year old looked around worriedly, relaxing only slightly when he remembered where he was. The strange place where Daniel and the others found him ... the stranger trip through the water ... the new toys ... General Travis ... and finally, Mr. Standish, Mr. Wilmington, and Mr. Sanchez.
However, he realized as his body relaxed that he really, really needed to go potty. Kevin grimaced and began looking around for a way to find the potty, without waking up any of the men. Too late. As he shifted on the cot, Mr. Sanchez raised his head and blinked. Kevin would have laughed, but he really didn't want to wet his pants. Besides, Mr. Sanchez was nice to him, gave him the dog. Snoopy.
After a few seconds, Mr. Sanchez smiled and said softly, "You need to visit the restroom, son?" Kevin didn't ask how he knew. He just bobbed his head, squirming as he did so. Mr. Sanchez reached out and Kevin put his arms around the man's neck, allowing him to lift him from the cot. Mr. Sanchez carried him from the room and kept carrying him until they reached a new place. The big man (and really, he looked like a giant to the little boy) looked inside the room and said, "All clear. You think you can manage that by yourself?"
Kevin peeked inside and flinched when he saw how big the toilet was. It looked bigger than Kevin. Mr. Sanchez seemed to agree, for he picked up Kevin again, kicked the door shut behind him, then carried the boy over to the toilet. By this time, the little boy was practically dancing from how bad he needed to go. But he was so proud of himself for not having an accident, and so glad he was wearing pajama bottoms he could just push down.
Just a few minutes later, Kevin was feeling much better, and actually found himself giggling as Mr. Sanchez swung him over to the sink to wash his hands. Then he jumped when there was a great, roaring sound! Kevin looked at the source of the sound, and discovered it was the toilet! The toilet was flushing itself! Amazed, the little boy looked at Mr. Sanchez and breathed, "It's magic! It flushed itself!"
Mr. Sanchez just grinned at him, settling Kevin on one knee. How he managed to stand on just one leg and hold a little boy, Kevin didn't know, but he put his hands under the sink and waited for Mr. Sanchez to turn on the water. Only something magical happened instead. The water turned itself on! Kevin's mouth fell open as he scrubbed his hands vigorously under the water, just like his mama taught him.
Once his hands were good and clean, Kevin next found his hands under some strange device (there were a lot of strange things in this place ... his life had been strange from the moment he woke up yesterday). Kevin giggled as hot air blew over his hands, drying them. He rubbed his hands together in delight, and heard Mr. Sanchez laugh. But when the little boy looked at the giant, there was only that grin from before.
"All done?" Mr. Sanchez asked and Kevin nodded. He was actually hungry, and much as he hated it, he also knew he wouldn't get out of taking a bath today. He squealed as Mr. Sanchez lifted him once more, only this time, as they left the potty room, Kevin found himself atop the giant's shoulders. Kevin gasped ... he had never been this high before! He could see ... well ... all the way down the hall.
As they walked back to the place where Kevin slept the previous night, Mr. Sanchez said, "There's one other thing, son. I want you to call me by my first name. It's Josiah, and that's what all my friends call me. I'd like you to be one of my friends." Jo-si-ah. J'siah. Kevin nodded, then realized that Mr. ... J'siah ... couldn't see him, so he whispered, 'Okay.' Mr. J'siah gave a little bounce, to the boy's delight, and laughed softly when Kevin did.
They were almost to the end of the hall and back in the office, when a voice called, "Josiah!" Mr. J'siah turned and Kevin saw three ... no, four ... people coming toward them. One, Kevin recognized ... the pretty blonde lady. He remembered her from yesterday. She reminded him a lot of his mama. He offered her a shy smile, and got one in return that made him feel like the sun was coming up. Like his mama's.
On one side of her was a tall man, also with blond hair. He was the one who called Mr. J'siah, and Kevin tensed. He looked scary. As if sensing Kevin's fear, Mr. J'siah patted his knee reassuringly, and said, "Chris, good to see you back. Mary ... Billy ... Drina." That distracted Kevin from the scary man, and he looked at the two remaining people. One was a little boy, holding tightly to the blonde lady's hand. He looked like he was older than Kevin, but he smiled when he looked at the child atop J'siah's shoulders. He didn't seem mean.
Relaxing a little, Kevin turned his attention to the last person, another lady. She was shorter than the blonde lady, with dark hair that reached her shoulders.
His mama wore her hair like that. And while the new lady's hair was much darker, that didn't matter. Mr. J'siah said, plucking Kevin from his shoulders and settling him on the ground, "Kevin, you remember Chris and Mary from yesterday, don't you?" Kevin nodded warily, eyeing the two people he met the previous day. Mr. J'siah continued, "That young man is Billy, Mary's son." The other boy smiled at Kevin, his eyes lighting up with excitement. He was excited? To meet Kevin? Why?
But that wasn't important right now, because Mr. J'siah was talking again, and he said, "And, Kevin, this lovely young woman is Adriana. She's Buck's younger sister, and the other Vin's girlfriend." Kevin snapped his eyes over to the dark-haired lady who now knelt in front of him. She had sad eyes (like Mama), but she smiled and extended her hand to Kevin. The little boy took it carefully.
Adriana said softly, "Hello, Kevin ... it's a pleasure to meet you." Kevin decided he liked it when she smiled. While her smile wasn't like his mother's ... it didn't look like his mother's ... this lady's smile did the same thing as his mama's. Her smile made him feel safe. And he knew, as he had known few things since waking up and coming to this place, that this lady would never, ever, hurt him. He still wasn't sure about the scary man ... or the pretty blonde lady. But the sadness in the eyes of the dark-haired lady, and her smile told him that he could be sure of her.
It was decided by the three adults that Mary, Billy, and Chris would remain at Adriana's house for the night, so they could all go to Cheyenne Mountain together. Adriana took the couch, giving Mary and Chris the bed, while Billy offered to keep Adriana company in the living room. Keep company ... it was more like, the eight year old had decided that he would guard Adriana, even though Mindy already did that.
Surprisingly, Adriana slept well, though she realized when she got up the following day that was because she hadn't allowed herself to think about Vin. Somehow, as she was drifting off to sleep, she managed to keep her mind away from her stricken boyfriend. Maybe because it didn't seem real yet? She didn't know yet. She just knew that she was up at five am again this morning, waiting on Mary to finish her shower so Adriana could take her own.
Billy was sleeping soundly in his sleeping bag, Mindy nestled at his side. Adriana wasn't sure if Chris was still asleep, though she seriously doubted it. Mary told her that Chris usually woke up as she was getting out of bed. Something about leaving parts of him uncovered that really shouldn't be cold. Mary hadn't explained further, and Adriana decided not to ask. She didn't think she wanted to know.
She shuffled into the kitchen, to find that she was wrong. Mary already had her shower, which meant Chris was in the bathroom now. Mary lifted her head and asked very softly, "You sleep okay?" Adriana lifted a shoulder in a shrug, then sat down at the table. Mary said, still in that low voice, "I had some unbelievably weird dreams. I haven't had breakfast, so I won't tell you about them." This was said as Mary dropped her eyes.
"I'm a pagan, Mary, with rituals of my own ... I'm not about to make fun of yours," Adriana said wearily, rubbing at her eyes. She had slept well ... sort of ... but she wasn't a morning person, and couldn't imagine a time when she would be. On the other hand, if she planned to become a mother at some point, that might be necessary. After a moment, she continued, "How long have the two of you been up?"
"I don't think either of us got any sleep last night. You know Chris ... he needs to take care of people. And once he doesn't have anyone to take care of ... it's rough for him. There's a part of him which is still angry with SG-1 ... another part which is afraid of this little boy ... and a third part which is secretly pleased about this. Because he gets the chance to be a big brother to Vin, when Vin had no one. And that makes him feel guilty," Mary answered. She took a sip of coffee, then added, "Not that he would ever admit to being afraid of a five year old."
"Oh, 'course not. Chris Larabee isn't afraid of a little five year old boy," Adriana retorted, then added more seriously, "And it's not like he's really afraid of him ... the situation scares him. What about you? How are you doing with this? I know that you love Vin, too. This has to be just as disconcerting for you as it is for Chris," Adriana observed. After all, the blonde woman was there when Vin was carried through the Gate by Daniel. Mary took a deep breath, her green eyes growing reflective as she put her coffee cup down.
"I suppose I haven't really allowed myself to stop and think about that. I've been worried about how Chris is reacting, and how Billy would react, and how afraid Vin must be ... how you would react. Maybe I'm afraid of what will happen when I do stop and think about it. But that doesn't feel right, either, Drina. It's like ... well, it's like, 'okay, so Vin has been turned into a five year old. How do we get him back to adulthood? And in the meantime, what's wrong with giving him a childhood like Buck, Ezra, and Josiah are doing?' Oh."
Come again? What was this about her brother, Josiah, and Ezra? Mary continued a bit sheepishly, "That's right, I forget. Your two brothers and your uncle went to one of the local toy stores for the new youngest member of the Seven." Adriana just raised her brows. Not that she was surprised by Buck and Ezra, but somehow, the picture of Josiah in a toy store didn't want to form. Not right away, at least.
Until she remembered him with Billy, and the image formed nicely. She said, "I just hope they didn't buy out the store, especially Buck and Ezra. My brother definitely works under the idea sometimes that more is better. Not that this is a bad thing, necessarily, but we don't want to overwhelm the poor kid. Did I ever tell you about the first time I met Buck?" Mary shook her head, a smile appearing, and Adriana explained, "Like I think I told you, I was seven years old when I met him. And he was eighteen."
She paused with a smile, remembering that long ago day, then went on, "I remember the fall semester at the Academy had just started, and this tall, handsome young man knocked on our door. My mother sent me to my room, so the grown-ups could talk. But Buck stopped her, and said I was the reason he was there. He wanted to meet his baby sister. That's how I found out I had an older brother."
I was the reason he was there. Adriana raised her eyes to Mary as that memory surfaced and she asked, "How did I ever lose sight of that? My brother appearing on the doorstep of the father who had ignored him for eighteen years, so he could meet his little sister? Become part of my life? How could I have forgotten that?" Mary reached across the table and took her hand, the curiosity in her green eyes giving way to determination.
"You lost your way for a time, Adriana, you both did. Buck never stopped loving you, and you never stopped loving him. And that is the important thing. That, and not losing each other again," Mary said softly. Adriana closed her hand around Mary's, sighing quietly. They had lost so much time, though, because of her fear ... her pride. Mary added, "You both made mistakes, Adriana. He hurt you, without even realizing he was doing it, and you shut him out. But in the end, you didn't lose each other."
"I just wonder," Adriana said softly, "how much ... what would have happened if I hadn't been so angry ... then so proud ... after we rescued your father-in-law? I just ... I didn't know how to trust again, Mary. My brother didn't think I was as important as JD, would always choose JD over me ... and I hid behind my pride, behind my belief in that, instead of giving Buck another chance."
Mary's other hand came up to cup Adriana's hand between the two, and said softly, "I told you ... mistakes were made on both sides. And a person can handle rejection only so many times before shutting down. You reached that limit when Buck threw you into Orrin's arms. When you heard him say that Vin abandoned JD to rescue someone who probably didn't deserve to live. Yes, you knew that Buck didn't realize you were alone at the evacuation site, but it didn't hurt any less, did it?"
Adriana shook her head, and Mary continued, "And maybe you should have pushed the envelope with Buck, made him talk to you, from the beginning, while JD was recovering after that first mission. Maybe you should have done that, instead of retreating to the familiar and reassuring. Maybe you should have let down your guard with him after a few months, after that final break. Maybe you could have done a lot of things differently, and time would have been spent together. But as painful as this is to hear, Buck had to realize that you had your limits, and he had crossed them."
Adriana started to speak, but Mary continued, "I'm not saying I think things were done deliberately, to teach Buck a lesson. But I am sure about one thing ... because of that time when you shut him out, when he was nothing more than the member of another SG team ... Buck will never take you for granted again. Just as you will never take him for granted ... and just as JD will probably think before he judges someone."
Mary squeezed Adriana's hand between her own two, saying, "Like I said, there were mistakes all around. But. You learned from your mistakes, you have your big brother back ... both of them ... and as soon as the eldest of your big brothers gets out of the shower, we'll get started on the day. And on getting back your man ... my little brother." Adriana just sighed and smiled at her best friend, bringing up her hand to cover Mary's.
"Our little brother," Chris corrected, coming into the kitchen. He was still pulling on his t-shirt, giving Mary and Adriana an eyeful. The two young women looked at each other with impish grins. Especially when they saw his still-wet blond hair. Chris just glared at both of them, adding, "Not a word outta either of you two, or I'll have to tell Buck about who came up with the camera part of Ez and JD's prank on him."
The pair just laughed and released each other's hands. Adriana said, pushing herself to her feet, "And on that note, I'm getting my shower. Christopher, you did leave enough running water for me, didn't you?" She giggled, ducking the swat he aimed at the back of her head, then headed into the bathroom to shower ... carefully avoiding both Billy and Mindy as she did so. Give the lovebirds an extra few minutes of quiet time!
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