Second Childhood

By Jean Williams

Part Ten

Mary and Chris smiled as Billy leaped at the Judge, wrapping him in a big hug. "Grandpa! I'm so glad you finally got here! Did you bring me presents?!"

"Billy Travis... what did I tell you?" Mary sighed in exasperation as her father-in-law shushed her and assured Billy there was a case on the stage just filled with Christmas presents for him. "You're spoiling him, Orrin."

"Well, that's a Grandpa's job, isn't it? Hello, Chris... you take Mr. Wilmington's and Mr. Dunne's position of welcoming committee away from them?" Judge Orrin Travis was always amused to see the competition between his two out-going peacekeepers as they vied for the attentions of any young woman who happened to be on the stage. It always brightened the end of a long boring stage ride for him.

Chris smiled and nodded. "Thought I'd give the ladies a break from those two since it's Christmas." Then he sobered as he changed the subject. "I need to talk to you, Judge... after you've had a chance to rest up, of course."

The Judge studied Chris and Mary for a second, took in the seriousness of their expressions, and turned and passed Billy to his grandmother. "Evie... why don't you take Billy inside and help him put all those presents under the tree." He ruffled the young boy's hair and waited til he and his grandma had gone inside before turning back to Chris.

"Judge... it can wait til later. I know you must be-" Chris started to protest, but was stopped by the Judge's hand on his arm.

"It was a fairly easy trip this time... besides, I can see how important this is to you... and apparently to my daughter-in-law." He turned and walked into the building, leaving them no option but to follow.

After closing the door leading back to Mary's private rooms, Judge Travis sat down at her desk and motioned for the two of them to sit also. "Well, who's going to start?"

Chris glanced at Mary and seeing her nod encouragingly, began to tell the Judge about Ezra's accident and his present condition.

Orrin raised his eyes in amazement. "Mr. Standish actually believes himself to be a five year old?"

Chris chuckled and nodded. "Believe me, Judge... if you talked to him, you'd have trouble believing he isn't. Except for his size... and strength..." the gunslinger added, thinking about their earlier struggle with the bath, "there isn't much of the Ezra you know left. His actions, his speech... hell, even the expressions on his face are all those of a small child."

"Does Nathan have any idea how long he might be this way?" Orrin still hadn't figured out exactly what Chris wanted from him, it was obvious there was more to his nervousness than just Ezra's condition.

"He doesn't have any idea... it could be a few days, a few months or... maybe the rest of his life." Chris leaned forward in the chair and rubbed his hands wearily over his face. He hated to even think of that possibility, much less voice it.

"Has he remembered anything at all from before?" Orrin saw how hard it was for the younger man to talk about his friend's uncertain future.

"He only had one incident where something jogged his memory, and it got him so upset that Nathan decided we shouldn't push him... that he just wasn't ready for it to happen yet." Chris hadn't been there, but he could tell it had been bad by the look on Buck's face when he had told them about it..

"Has Maude been informed of his condition yet?" Immediately the Judge felt the atmosphere in the room change. Aha... here was the real reason behind the talk.

Chris nodded and stood up, pacing the room as he told the Judge that Maude knew about Ezra's accident but not the actual extent of his injury, and then he recited the contents of the telegram they had received.

"Why is she bringing a lawyer with her? I don't understand." Orrin saw Mary flinch at the anger that immediately appeared on the tall gunslinger's face.

"Because, Judge... she knows damn good and well we're not letting her take Ezra away from here without a fight." Chris's tone made it clear to the Judge that they'd do everything they had to to keep Ezra with them.

"She's his mother, Chris... naturally she's concerned for him and is going to want what's best." He knew the leader of his little group of peacekeepers was protective of his men, but he couldn't understand him wanting to keep Ezra away from his only family when he needed her most.

Mary quickly rose and put a calming hand on Chris's arm. She'd seen his body tense up at the Judge's mistaken impression of Maude Standish... and even though she'd had the same misconceptions, she knew better now. "Let Chris explain, Judge... he has very good reasons for wanting to keep Ezra here."

The Judge stared at both of them, and then leaned back in the chair and motioned for Chris to continue.

Chris glanced at Mary, and she excused herself to check on Billy and Evie. She respected their desire to ensure that the fewer people who knew about Ezra's troubled past, the better.

As soon as she closed the door, Chris took a deep, calming breath and began to fill the Judge in on everything Ezra had told them about his childhood. About his mother and her proclivity for sending him away to his uncle Matthew's for every little mistake he made, about the scars on his back from the whippings he said his uncle gave him, and the generally sad and miserable childhood he'd endured. And about Ezra's admitting that no one had ever loved him before. Chris held nothing back. He made sure the Judge knew exactly how close Ezra had become to all of them, especially to Buck... who had quickly become the most important person in his life. And how sure Nathan was that it would seriously damage the young man if he was torn away from his new family and the security he now felt, and shoved back into that life of fear and uncertainty he'd had before.

When he finally stopped and sat wearily back down in the chair, the Judge just stared at him as he tried to digest all he'd been told. He knew it had to be the truth... a five year old could not possibly make up anything this horrible. Orrin also came to the same conclusion Mary had... a little boy would do all he could to explain away any wrong-doings by his mother... not lie to make them seem worse.

The Judge looked at Chris and saw in his eyes exactly how much their young visitor had come to mean to him, and imagined it was the same for the others. "So exactly what do you want me to do?"

Chris looked him straight in the eye and prayed he'd understand the need for his request. "We want you to give us legal custody of Ezra."

Orrin shook his head and sighed. "That won't be easy, Chris. She is his mother..." he held his hand up to stop Chris's angry protest. "I know she doesn't deserve to ever get her hands on him again, but the fact is... as his mother, she has legal rights to his custody while he's incapacitated. However... if we have proof that she was neglectful and knowingly left him in an abusive environment, I might be able to legally have him taken into protective custody."

Chris started to smile and thank the Judge, but was stopped when the older man continued.

"But... I'm going to have to talk to Ezra myself. What you've told me is just hearsay... I need to hear everything that happened directly from him. Do you think he'll talk to me?" Orrin saw how much Chris hated the idea of putting Ezra through that kind of pain again, but he knew he'd do it if it would help keep him there.

"Is that necessary, Judge?" When he saw the older man nod, Chris knew he had no choice. "Alright... but only if Nathan and Buck can be with him at the time. I want Nathan there to stop it if he thinks it's getting to be too much for Ezra, and Buck... well, you'll understand why Buck needs to be there once you see the two of them together."

"That sounds reasonable. When is Maude due to arrive?" Orrin wanted to talk to Ezra before his mother and her attorney had a chance to start inundating him with demands. He wanted as much ammunition to use against them as he could get.

"According to her telegram, she's not supposed to arrive til the day after tomorrow. Can this wait til then, Judge? I don't want anything to ruin Ezra's first Christmas." Chris saw the other man's confusion and explained. "Maude wasn't interested in celebrating the holidays, much less spending any time or money on her son. Apparently the closest he's come to seeing what a real Christmas is like was when he was four... when he managed to get out of his room in the attic long enough to sneak a peek at his uncle Matthew and his family celebrating. He'd refused to aid his dear mother in a con she was trying to run on a preacher, so he'd been sent there to be punished again. Ezra doesn't think much of Christmas now, and we want to try and change that tomorrow."

"Okay, Chris... we'll wait til Monday, but it'll have to be early. I want to make sure I get to talk to Ezra before Maude gets here, and then I'll do everything I legally can to help him. Who knows, maybe we'll even get lucky and his memory will return by then." The Judge walked the younger man to the door and gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze before he left. "Try not to let yourself worry, Chris... you just make sure that young man has a Christmas he'll never forget."

"Don't worry, Judge... our Lit'l Ezra is about to find out exactly what it's like to have Christmas with people who care about-" Chris paused and knew in his heart it was more than that. "With a family that loves him."

Orrin watched the young man hurry across to the clinic and smiled. There was no doubt in his mind now... Ezra Standish deserved to stay here with his real family... and he would do everything in his power to make that happen.


Chris opened the door to the clinic and was immediately struck by the true sense of family that met his eyes. They were all crowded around Nathan's small table... talking, laughing, and passing plates and bowls of food back and forth. Ezra sat in the middle of it all with a towel tied around his neck... a chicken leg in one hand and a biscuit in the other. His face was smeared with butter and grease and he was grinning from ear to ear... and what really gladdened Chris's heart was the obvious fact that he was totally unconcerned with the spots of food that dotted his bib. Ezra finally realized he was safe to be himself... and that his brothers wouldn't punish him for not being perfect.

"Chwis! We was hopin' you'd huwwy up an' get herwe!" Ezra began pushing against Buck, shoving him farther down the bench they'd brought in from outside to give them all room to sit. "Come on, Chwis... sit herwe by me. We made surwe to save you w'ots of food... it's fwied chicken an' it's dewicious!"

Nathan glanced across the table at the gambler and noticed the biscuit clutched in his left hand. "Ezra... put that biscuit down an' quit usin' that arm... I told ya if ya keep doin' that, I'm gonna have t' put it in a sling."

Ezra scowled at the mention of the sling and quickly set the biscuit down on his plate. He couldn't understand why Nathan kept fussing about it, it didn't hurt all that bad.

The enticing aromas of the food that covered the table finally reached Chris's nose, and his stomach rumbled as he squeezed in between Ezra and JD on the bench. Ezra giggled when he heard it and immediately set his piece of chicken down and passed the older man the plate of chicken. "Sounds w'ike you betterw huwwy up an' eat, Chwis! Good f'ing we w'eft you pwenty of chicken!"

Chris saw the others staring at him anxiously as he began piling food on his plate. He nodded at them reassuringly and mouthed 'later' and then turned his attention back to the younger man who was contentedly leaning against him while he ate. "Now who knew fried chicken was my favorite?"

Ezra stared at him, his bright green eyes widened in pleasant surprise. "I picked it, Chwis. It's yourw favorwite, too?"

"Sure is... especially the leg." Chris laughed as Ezra's eyes grew even wider.

"Mine, too! That's pwetty neat, huh? We bof w'ike d' same f'ings." He snuggled tighter against the man in black and sighed contentedly when Chris wrapped an arm around him, pulling him even closer.

It was awkward eating, he had to put his fork down everytime he wanted a bite of chicken or a drink of his coffee, but Chris didn't mind. It was worth it to see Ezra so comfortable and relaxed with them... and to see that bright smile that just seemed to light up the room.

Chris glanced down as he took a sip of his coffee and noticed Ezra's cup. "What ya drinkin' there, little guy... that's not coffee, is it?"

"Nuh-uh... it's tea wif honey in it... you wanna twy it?" Ezra held his mug up to Chris, but the older man shook his head and told him he'd stick to his coffee.

"That's not Nathan's tea, is it?" Chris almost choked as he felt a shudder ripple through the smaller man's body, and saw the expression of disgust that immediately appeared on his face.

"Heck no! D'is tea tastes good!" Ezra jumped when everyone but Nathan roared with laughter. He smiled hesitantly at the others, not sure why they were laughing... but his smile faded when his eyes landed on the healer.

Nathan glared at the men who were having a huge laugh at his expense. "Sure... y'all laugh it up... but jus' wait til the next time one of ya gets shot or sick... I'll jus' let ya suffer. I wouldn't wanna poison ya with any of my concoctions as y'all like t' call 'em."

Ezra immediately pulled away from Chris and struggled to get up. Buck grabbed his arm and steadied him as he climbed off the bench. "Where ya goin', pard?"

The others stopped laughing and exchanged guilty looks as Ezra limped around the table and sat down beside Nathan, wrapping his arms around him in an apologetic hug. "I'm sowwy, Nafan. I didn't mean to huwt yourw feewin's... I know you jus' give me d' tea to make me betterw."

Now it was Nathan's turn to feel guilty. He hadn't meant to include Ezra in what he said... he knew the Southerner was just telling the truth. "No... I'm the one who's sorry, Ezra. I wasn't talkin' 'bout you... you were jus' bein' honest. I meant these other ingrates who seem t' enjoy givin' me a hard time. I know you'd never say or do nothin' t' hurt nobody's feelin's." Nathan hugged Ezra tight and then gently pushed him away. "Now you get yourself back over there an' finish your supper before Buck snatches that chicken right off your plate... I saw 'im over there eyeballin' it."

It was Nathan's turn to laugh when he saw Buck start shaking his head and protesting his innocence as Ezra hurried back around the table. "You betterw not eat my chicken, Buck!"

Ezra squeezed back into his seat and grabbing up his chicken leg, leaned back against Chris again... keeping a watchful eye on Buck as he ate.

The rest of the afternoon was spent quietly. Nathan brought out his checkerboard to Ezra's delight, and they all took turns playing the gambler while they waited for him to get tired enough to sleep.


It was nearly seven before they finally got Ezra wore down enough to let them tuck him into bed, and as usual he gave Buck one look and the ladies man was right there beside him.

The rest of them left to gather up all the stuff they'd prepared to decorate the clinic with and to get their presents for Ezra. Hopefully by the time they returned, he'd be asleep and they could start getting ready for tomorrow.


Buck stretched out beside Ezra and smiled as he immediately curled up around him. The younger man had his head tucked up under Buck's chin, his arm thrown over his stomach, and the rest of his body pressed tightly against him. Now that he was finally experiencing the joy and wonder of a gentle human touch, it was as if he just couldn't get enough of it. And heaven knows, they were all willing to oblige him, especially Buck. Just the sweet look of pure happiness that washed over him everytime one of them hugged him back or just sat with their arm around him, was enough to keep them wanting to give him more.

Ezra yawned and snuggled closer as Buck tucked the covers around his shoulders. "Are you comfortable layin' like that, pard? Wouldn't ya rather use the pillow than my hard ol' chest?"

"Nuh-uh... I w'ike it d'is way 'cause I can hearw yourw hearwt beatin'." Ezra yawned again, and mumbled sleepily, "Makes me feewl safe."

"It does, huh?" Buck was rubbing his hand lightly up and down the younger man's back, and could feel his breathing even out and his muscles relax as he drifted off.

"Mmmm... hmmm... wuv you, Buck..." Ezra's voice was barely a whisper, and he was fast asleep within minutes.

Buck smiled and wrapped his arms around Ezra as he whispered back. "Wuv you too, Little One."

It was about a half hour later when the door opened slowly and Vin peeked his head around the edge. "He asleep?" When Buck nodded, he eased the door open wider and Josiah and Nathan came in and quietly proceeded to block the bed off from the rest of the room. They'd strung a rope across that part of the clinic and hung spare blankets over one end of it when it had become apparent that Ezra would be there for a while. Whenever one of the townsfolk came to Nathan for doctoring, the blankets were quickly spread out over the rope... effectively hiding Ezra from prying eyes. He'd been carefully instructed to keep quiet while others were there, and had been very good about not making a sound.

They helped Buck ease out from under the gambler, and made sure he was settled comfortably and still sound asleep before getting started. Nathan and Josiah carried in the boxes of decorations they'd made, and Chris set a package on the table containing some brightly colored ribbons and small candles Mary had donated.

Vin and JD wrestled the tree through the door... thankfully Ezra slept through the arguing and muffled curses that accompanied that task. Once they finally had it in and standing basically straight, the others congratulated them on their choice of a tree, proclaiming it good enough for their Lit'l Ezra.

After more arguing, Chris pulled rank... and as their leader, claimed the right to put the star they'd borrowed off the church's tree on top. They'd just started draping the garland of popcorn and wild currants that Josiah and Nathan had made, when they were all startled by a muffled thump and then the sound of Ezra crying for Buck. The ladies man hurried around the blankets, and found Ezra sitting up in the bed, sobbing out his name and cradling his broken arm against his chest.

Buck sat down beside Ezra and pulled him into his arms, rocking him back and forth slowly to calm him. "Shush now... I'm right here. What happened... did ya bang your arm again?"

Ezra's sobs had eased, but tears still streamed down his face as he nodded and continued to clutch at his arm. "It huwts, Buck!"

Nathan came around the wall of blankets and sat beside the two men. He saw Ezra holding his arm and looked at Buck. "Again?" This was about the third or fourth time he'd hurt it... either by banging it in his sleep, or by forgetting and leaning on it.

When Buck nodded, Nathan reached for the smaller man's arm. "Let me look at it, Ezra... I'll be careful." Ezra reluctantly allowed the healer to ease it away from his chest, and watched as he removed the splints, whimpering in pain as Nathan gently probed the new bruise that was quickly forming. "Well, we're lucky... ya didn't break it again, but I ain't takin' no more chances with it... it's goin' in a sling an' I'm strappin' it t' your chest."

"No, Nafan! I'll be morwe carweful, I pwomise!" Ezra began to whine... he was tired and in pain, and he seemed to have already developed the aversion he had to being restrained in any way. Nathan had found it nearly impossible to get the adult Ezra to submit to the confining use of a sling, no matter how serious the injury. The healer had assumed it was just a claustrophobic reaction to his having been cooped up in a jail cell on numerous occasions during his career as a con man and gambler... but now he wasn't so sure. Maybe it had something to do with his forced visits to Uncle Matthew's.

"I'm sorry, Ezra... I have t' do this or your arm ain't gonna heal right." Nathan replaced the splints on the gambler's arm, and then gathered up what materials he needed. When the healer sat back down beside Ezra, he started to cry in earnest... pleading with Nathan to leave his arm free and begging Buck to help him.

This immediately brought the rest of the men to Ezra's side, and Nathan grew angry and resentful when they started questioning the need for the sling.

"Y'all are actin' like I'm doin' this t' torture 'im! Ya think I like havin' to be the one t' do this t' 'im, knowin' how he feels 'bout wearin' the damn thing?" Nathan stared at the other men, who at least had the decency to look ashamed for making him out to be the villain in Ezra's eyes. They knew he wouldn't put the little guy through this if it wasn't absolutely necessary.

They all apologized to Nathan and helped him convince Ezra that it would only be for a short time, and that it was important for him to do as Nathan said so his arm would get better.

Ezra finally calmed down and agreed to let Nathan work on him, but only after the healer promised it would only have to be strapped down for a week. He sat on the bed surrounded by his big brothers, sniffling quietly as Nathan placed his arm in the sling, and then wrapped it with several long strips of bandage, fastening it snugly across his chest. The others did all they could to console him... dried his tears, patted his back, hugged him, and assured him that his arm wouldn't hurt as much now.

Once Ezra finally quit fussing about the sling, he noticed the blankets hanging across the room. "Why'd you put d'ose up d'erwe, Nafan?" Then he remembered and started whispering. "Have you got a patient overw d'erwe, Nafan? I'm sowwy I wasn't bein' quiet w'ike I'm s'posed to."

"No, there's no patient, Ezra... we're... um..." They all looked at each other, frantically trying to come up with a plausible reason for the barricade.

"Um... well... we were playin' cards an' didn't want to wake you up." Buck looked up at the others and shrugged. It wasn't a great explanation, but it was better than nothing. And the important thing was that Ezra believed him.

"You'rwe pwayin' carwds?! Can I pway, too?!" Ezra started to scramble off the bed, but stopped when six loud shouts of "NO!" startled him, and he stopped before his feet even hit the floor and just stared at the other men. His lower lip began to quiver, and there was a definite whine in his voice when he responded to them. "Why can't I pway, too? I know how to pway carwds. You don't want me to pway?"

They all looked at Buck... he'd started this little charade, let him explain it.

Buck shot them a glare, and then looked at Ezra. "We're playin' poker, pard... you-"

Ezra grinned and interrupted him. "I know how to pway pokerw... I'm w'eawy good at it!"

Nathan stared intently at the gambler... another memory? "You remember how to play poker, Ezra?"

Ezra frowned at Nathan. "Surwe I w'ememberw. Mama taught me when I was fourw. She's made w'ots of money takin' me to sawoons an' gettin' d' men d'erwe to pway me. D'ey all f'ink 'cause I'm w'ittle d'at d'ey can beat me... but d'ey aw'most neverw do." He never noticed the angry looks that were exchanged as he gave them one more reason to keep him out of Maude's greedy clutches. "So... can I pway?"

Buck looked pointedly at Nathan and nodded at the bed. Nathan stared at him for a moment, and then caught on. He motioned for everyone to move out of the way, and then reluctantly placed his hands on Ezra's shoulders and began easing him back. "Not this time, little guy... it's late an' ya need t' be gettin' some sleep now. Maybe tomorrow, okay?"

Ezra nodded sadly and allowed Nathan to lay him down and cover him back up, but tears immediately began to form in his eyes as he watched them disappear one by one behind the wall of blankets. Buck stopped and looked back at the gambler and had to stifle a groan. Apparently Ezra had learned how to manipulate people at a young age, too. He lay there staring back at the ladies man with those big, glistening green eyes, one lone tear trickling down his cheek, and his thumb tucked in his mouth... and somehow managed to make himself look small and lost in that big bed of Nathan's. Buck shook his head, knowing he couldn't just leave him there like that ,and leaned around the edge of the blanket. "Um... deal me out, guys... I'm gonna stay here an' keep Ezra company til he falls asleep."

The others looked back at him and smirked... they'd known he'd end up staying with Ezra. They went back to decorating the tree, trying to be as quiet as possible in the hopes the gambler would be able to fall back to sleep.

Buck moved back to the bed and curled up around Ezra, wiping the tears from his eyes and smoothing back his hair as he tried to comfort him. He was doing a pretty good job of it until the younger man attempted to get in his usual sleeping position with his head on Buck's chest... and found he couldn't do it with his arm secured the way it was.

Ezra tugged frantically on his arm, fighting the claustrophobic feelings the bindings produced in him. "I hate d'is, Buck... I hate it." His voice was a trembling whisper, and Buck could hear the tears threatening again.

"I know ya do, little guy... an' I'm real sorry Nathan had to do that to ya, but it won't be for long, an' ya know he hates ya havin' to wear it almost as much as you do." Buck saw Ezra nod, and he could also see how hard the smaller man was trying not to cry. "Here... let's see if we can't find a new position for ya to sleep in." Buck got Ezra turned partly on his side, and then pulled the smaller man back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around him and rested his cheek against the tousled brown head that was now cradled against his shoulder. "How's this, pard... better?"

"Uh-huh... f'ank you, Buck." Ezra sighed contentedly, and brought his hand up to wrap his fingers around the older man's hand.

"Anytime, Little One... I just want ya happy." Buck linked his fingers with Ezra's and squeezed gently.

"I'm aw'ways happy when I'm wif you, Buck." Ezra felt the larger man's arms tighten around him and smiled sleepily. Then he stared at the blankets blocking off the rest of the room, and grew curious about the rustling sounds coming from the other side. "D'ey don't sound w'ike d'ey'rwe pwayin' pokerw. Nobody's askin' forw carwds, orw bettin', orw nuffin'. What arwe d'ey doin', Buck?"

The others had finished wrapping the garland around the tree and were tying brightly colored ribbons amongst the branches, clipping on the candle holders, and hanging small shiny red apples tied with strands of green yarn. When they heard the gambler's remarks, they realized they'd underestimated the intelligence of this particular five year old. They looked at each other and then at the barricade, and knew they'd better think of something quick, or Ezra would start asking so many questions he'd never get to sleep.

JD glanced at his friends, and announced in a loud voice... "I fold. You sure dealt a lousy hand that time, Josiah."

The others stared at him, temporarily speechless, until he motioned impatiently for them to join in. Josiah hesitated for a second, and then followed the young man's lead. "Don't blame me, JD... it's just the luck of the cards."

"I don't know, Josiah... I kinda gotta agree with JD... these are the worst cards I've had all night. I fold, too. What'd ya do, keep all the good cards up your sleeve?" Nathan heard Ezra giggle on the other side of the blanket, and knew it was working.

Vin saw them look at him, and after a second, added his voice to the ruse. "Don't listen to 'em, Josiah... ya did a fine job of dealin'." He proceeded to make the appropriate comments of seeing and raising the bet, and then looked at Chris.

Chris saw all eyes turn to him and scowled back at the four men. He felt ridiculous decorating a Christmas tree and carrying on an imaginary card game at the same time, but since it was for their Lit'l Ezra, he guessed he could do his part. "Um... too steep for me, Vin... I'm out."

Suddenly a childish southern drawl drifted over to them from the other side of the blankets. "You should've bwuffed, Chwis!"

The men grinned at each other and had to struggle to control the laughter that threatened to erupt. Chris took a moment to get his voice under control, and then managed to answer the gambler. "Thanks, Ezra... I'll know better next time."

For the next hour, the guys continued to call out a litany of complaints about each other's dealing, grumbled over unreasonable bets, and occasionally gloated over an imaginary perfect hand as they finished decorating the tree. Everytime they thought Ezra might have finally drifted off, they'd hear him giggle, or another one of his comments on their poker playing abilities would come floating over the barricade. Each one had the men clutching their sides and struggling to contain their laughter.

"'siah neverw knows when to fold" was accompanied by a huge sigh of disappointment.

"JD aw'ways twies to bwuff, but he can't 'cause he gets d'at big goofy gwin on his face" was followed by a loud snicker.

"Nafan neverw wins 'cause he won't keep bettin'... he's cheap, isn't he, Buck?" was nearly drowned out by Buck's sudden burst of laughter.

And "you gotta watch Vin... he cheats aw'most as good as I do!" caused Vin to blush furiously, and the rest of them to roar with laughter.

After they had the tree decorated to everyone's satisfaction, they discovered they had plenty enough garland and apples to hang around the rest of the clinic. By the time Ezra finally fell asleep, the only thing left to do was his presents. Each of the men had carefully placed their gift for their new little brother under the tree, with Nathan retrieving Buck's gift from his medicine cabinet and adding it to the pile. After deciding to leave the blankets hanging until morning, they went around to check on Buck and Ezra, and found them both sound asleep.

Ezra was wrapped tightly in the older man's arms, their fingers still intertwined and their heads pressed together. Both men had small smiles on their faces and seemed so content, no one had the heart to disturb them. Josiah moved forward, and with Vin's help, carefully removed Buck's boots before tucking the covers up around them both. Nathan frowned at the two spots of red that colored Ezra's cheeks, and leaned down to rest a gentle hand against his face.

JD noticed the concerned look on the healer's face, and watched worriedly as he tested for a fever. "He okay, Nathan?"

Nathan moved away from the bed before answering, his voice low and uncertain. "Can't really tell... he feels a little warm, but it could jus' be from all the commotion today. We'll have t' wait an' see how he is in the mornin' t' be sure, but it wouldn't surprise me none t' see 'im end up with a cold after last night." He and Ezra both had problems avoiding colds when the weather turned. Since they came from the Deep South, their constitutions just couldn't handle the extreme drops in temperature that frequently occurred in the winters out here.

Chris stared at Buck and Ezra, so obviously happy and content together, and then watched the rest of his men as they fussed over their brother. He wished the Judge was here right now... one look at this heart-warming scene and he would have to be convinced of the rightness of Ezra being allowed to remain here.

Vin turned the lamp down and they all moved back to the other side of the clinic, admiring their handiwork once more before spreading out their bedrolls, and settling in for some much needed sleep. They'd agreed to spend the night in the clinic so they would be there the minute Ezra awoke... none of them wanted to miss his reaction to the surprise they'd worked so hard on.


Buck was jerked awake when Ezra began thrashing against him in the bed, moaning and tearing at the bandages that held his arm in place. He grabbed at the smaller man's hand, trying to restrain him before he hurt himself. Before Buck was even fully awake, Vin was leaning over the bed trying to help. The tracker had been sleeping right next to the blankets and had immediately come awake when Ezra had started crying out in his sleep.

"Ezra... come on, little guy... open your eyes... it's Buck... you're okay now." Buck whispered soothingly in the gambler's ear as Vin held his head still, stroking his hair and face in an attempt to wake him.

Ezra's frantic movements slowed, and then stopped as they managed to bring him out of the nightmare he had been lost in. His eyes fluttered several times and then flew open, and his body tensed against the hold they had on him. "Buck?!"

Vin saw the panic in the green eyes that stared up at him, and he quickly cupped Ezra's face in his hands and turned it gently toward Buck. "He's right here, pard... take it easy."

Ezra's eyes locked immediately onto Buck's, and he began to struggle again, but this time he was just trying to get into the safety of the older man's embrace. Vin helped him get turned over, and once Buck had his arms wrapped around him, the gambler slowly began to calm down. Vin sat beside them, his hand on Ezra's leg, hoping his touch would help keep him grounded in the present.

Ezra had his face buried in Buck's neck, and his slender fingers clutched at the larger man's shirt. Buck could feel him shuddering and gasping for breath as he tried to get his terror under control, and the ladies man automatically began rocking him back and forth as he continued to whisper in his ear. "Shh, Little One... Buck's got ya... nothin' can hurt ya now." Once Ezra had finally quit trembling and was breathing normally again, Buck decided to try and find out what he'd been dreaming about. "Nightmare, pard?" He felt the gambler nod his head slowly. "Wanna tell me about it?" A shake indicating no this time. "Was it the men from last night?" Another no. "Uncle Matthew?"

Vin and Buck both saw and felt the immediate change in Ezra... his body stiffened and he began to shiver, and his breathing quickened until he was again emitting the short, sharp gasps from before.

Vin began stroking the gambler's leg in an effort to calm him. "Easy, pard... it was just a nightmare... he can't hurt you now." But it wasn't helping... they both could feel Ezra's terror mounting again, and decided to just back off for now. Maybe he'd talk about it later... it was still just too real for his young mind to handle.

Buck held him tighter and began running his hand over Ezra's back, calming him slowly with his gentle touch. "It's okay, Ezra... you don't have to remember it now. Just go back to sleep, an' I'll be right here to protect you... I won't let anyone hurt you, Little One."

It took several minutes, but Ezra finally gave in to his exhaustion and slipped into a deep and thankfully dreamless, slumber. Buck looked up at Vin, and the anger and worry were evident in his dark blue gaze.

"Did ya catch any of what he was sayin' before we got him woke up?" Buck had been still half asleep, and his only thoughts had been getting Ezra calmed down... he hadn't paid any attention to what the gambler was muttering.

Vin shrugged. "I only caught some of it... 'Uncle' an' 'don't leave me here', I think. Then he mumbled somethin' that sounded like 'manda', but I ain't real sure 'bout that one."

"Manda? What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Buck stared at Vin as he ran the word through his mind, trying to figure out what Ezra could have meant.

Vin shook his head. "I got no idea what it could be... might not even be what he said. That was 'bout when he started cryin' an' mumblin'... couldn't really understand much after that." Vin stood and tucked the blankets over Ezra's shoulders before turning to go. "You two gonna be okay?"

Buck's arms tightened protectively around the younger man as he looked up at the sharpshooter, a touch of anger still flashing in his eyes. "Yeah, I'll watch over 'im... go try an' get some more sleep."

Buck looked down at the Southerner cradled in his arms, at the tears still drying on his cheeks, and pressing his face against the sweat dampened hair, whispered, "What the hell did he do to you, Ezra... what the hell did that miserable bastard do to scare you this much?"


Continued