Buck stood outside the jail looking in at JD. The boy sat slumped in the chair behind the desk, and looked as if he would burst into tears at any moment. Buck felt most of his anger drain away as he saw how miserable the Kid looked, and realized Chris was right... he was hurting just as much as Ezra was.
Buck opened the door and stepped inside... a small smile appearing on his face as he heard the loud snoring coming from one of the cells. "Mr. Sanderson?" When JD nodded, the gunman grabbed the keys and unlocked the cell door... shaking his head at the sleeping form sprawled across one of the cots. The farmer was a regular on the weekends... drinking himself into oblivion to escape, at least for a short while, the nagging, domineering woman he'd married.
"Come on, Jacob... time to head on home." Buck shook the man several times before a pair of blood-shot eyes finally peered up at him.
"Damn... is it that time already, Buck?" Sanderson was reluctant to leave... he knew the battle that would ensue when he arrived back at the farm. With a grunt of pain as his head began to throb, he pushed himself up onto his feet, weaving and grabbing at Buck's arm as he waited for the room to stop spinning.
Buck laughed softly at the other man's obvious discomfort, and led him toward the door as soon as he seemed steady on his feet. "You gonna be able to make it okay?" He kept his hand on Sanderson's elbow as he walked him out onto the boardwalk.
"Yeah, thanks, Buck... I'll be fine... at least til I get home anyway." Sanderson grinned ruefully at the thought of the tongue lashing he was in for, and headed slowly toward the livery.
Buck laughed and watched until the farmer turned into the alley leading to the stables, then reentered the jail and closed the door. He stared at JD, who was nervously fiddling with a pencil lying on the desk. When the boy finally turned his dark eyes up to him, he asked softly, "You okay?"
JD just nodded and lowered his eyes back to the desk. "Ezra alright?"
Buck sighed at the despondent tone of the young boy's voice, and moved over to perch on the edge of the desk beside him. "He's scared to death... disappointed in me... but physically he's okay. A few new cuts an' bruises, but nothing serious." When JD just nodded and refused to look up, Buck reached out and touched his arm. "What happened, JD... why'd ya tell 'im?"
JD looked up at Buck... confusion apparent on his face. He was expecting Buck to ask about his leaving Ezra alone... not this. "Tell 'im what?"
Buck frowned at JD's reaction. "That Maude is comin' for 'im... that's why he got upset an' left the clinic... he was lookin' for me to find out if it was true. An' for that matter, why'd ya leave 'im alone like that? I asked ya to stay with 'im til I got back."
JD stared at Buck for a moment, thinking back to what occurred while he was staying with Ezra, and then realization dawned on him and pain filled his eyes at the damage his careless words had caused. "I thought he was asleep... I was just mumblin' to myself 'cause I was mad... I didn't realize he was listenin' to me." He was willing to take the blame for that one, but his voice turned indignant when he answered the question about leaving before he was supposed to. "As for leavin' 'im alone... I thought you were on your way back. I saw ya leave the saloon and head this way, so I left and went back to the jail. I just wasn't ready to talk to ya yet." JD shot Buck an accusing look. "Where the heck did ya go, anyway? You should of made it back there before he had a chance to even get outta the room."
Buck's face flushed with color as he remembered what had happened in the alley... JD was right, he had no business piling all the blame for this on him. All he could think about was the incredibly hurt look on Ezra's face when he'd shouted at him in the alley, and the disappointment in his eyes when he found out Buck had known his mama was coming. And now here was JD looking at him with all that same hurt and disappointment on his young face.
"You're right, JD... an' I'm sorry. This is more my fault than yours. I should've told Ezra about Maude an' not taken the chance of him finding out accidentally. An' I would have been back here before he'd had a chance to even get to the street, but... " He stared at the boy and knew if he told him why he was late getting back to the clinic, that look of disappointment would deepen... but he just couldn't lie to him. "Millie grabbed me an' dragged me into the alley as I went by. I tried to get away from her, but I guess I didn't try hard enough."
JD stared at Buck as if he'd grown a second head... and then he surprised Buck, and even himself, when he started to laugh. "Buck... I've seen Millie, remember? She's smaller than I am... you couldn't get away from her?"
Buck smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, well... she's a lot stronger than she looks... an' she'd missed me. She was pretty determined to keep me in there." He looked with admiration at JD... the Kid had a huge capacity for forgiveness. Buck knew how much JD looked up to him, and it continually amazed him... because he had no idea why he did. He just knew he didn't want to lose their friendship... and he also knew he was going to have to work hard to keep it.
"JD... I'm sorry I've been neglectin' ya." JD shook his head and started to tell him it was okay, to just forget it, but Buck stopped him. "No, son... it's not okay. It's never okay to take advantage of a friendship as deep as ours. I did a whole lot of assuming, an' never gave a thought to how ya really felt. I got real attached to Lit'l Ezra an' I just assumed you would, too... of course, Ezra didn't give me a whole lot of choice in the matter." Buck chuckled as he thought about how the gambler had latched onto him with both hands and his heart. Nope, no choice in the matter at all. "But I never even paid attention to the fact that you weren't findin' it as easy to deal with 'im. I should've seen it an' tried to help ya with it."
"Yeah, well... maybe I should of told ya how I was feelin' about it all.. but I just kept waitin' for ya to notice. When you didn't say anything about it, I just assumed ya' knew but didn't care... that ya wanted it to be just you and Ezra." JD sighed and shook his head. "Then I kept havin' these strange feelin's about Ezra... like I was losin' him, too. I couldn't figure out why I was feelin' that way until just before you got here. I finally realized I was mad 'cause he-"
"'Cause he turned to me instead of you?" Buck smiled when he saw the surprise on JD's face. "Wasn't me figured it out, it was Josiah. Said you'd been gettin' almost as close to Ezra as ya were to me, an' ya probably felt like we we're both pushin' ya away now. I didn't think it made any sense 'cause Ezra didn't remember ya from before, but Vin said ya were thinkin' with your heart instead of your head."
JD nodded. "I sat here tryin' to tell myself what I was feelin' didn't make sense... but that didn't stop me feelin' it. Guess Vin's right... my heart just wanted me to be close to Ezra again... our Ezra... and I resented Lit'l Ezra for takin' him and you away from me. Crazy, huh?" He grinned ruefully up at Buck waiting for the ladies man to agree with him, but to his surprise he shook his head.
"Not crazy... just human. Ya can't help what ya feel in your heart, JD." Buck stuck his hand out and smiled nervously at the boy. "Friends again?"
JD grinned up at him and gripped Buck's hand hard. "Friends."
Buck heaved a huge sigh of relief and stood up. "Well then, how 'bout we go over to the clinic an' see if we can get Ezra to forgive us. An' then tomorrow we'll all get to work on givin' him the biggest, best Christmas a little boy... um... a man... could have."
"Sounds darn good to me, Buck. So... did you and Millie have a nice... um... talk... while ya were in that alley?" JD's grin grew even wider as Buck knocked his hat forward over his eyes as they left the jail. He hadn't realized just how much he'd missed his big brother til now. Reaching up, the younger man grabbed Buck's floppy hat right off his head before racing across the street, his laughter trailing behind him as the ladies man yelled and gave chase.
Vin and Josiah saw the two of them romping in the street as they came riding back into town and exchanged identical looks of relief. At least that part of their family was back to normal... now if they could only get Ezra back, everything would be right with their world again.
Chris was holding tightly to a squirming and reluctant Ezra while Nathan tried to coax him into drinking the mug of tea he held to his lips, when Buck and JD entered the clinic. Ezra immediately began crying for the ladies man, his arms reaching out for him and nearly knocking the mug from Nathan's hands.
"Buck! Make d'em stop... pwease... I don't wanna drwink no tea... it's too yucky!" With an incredible ability to forgive that only a child has, Ezra immediately dismissed how mad and hurt he'd been with Buck the minute the man stepped into the room.
Nathan and Chris both moved off the bed, gladly giving over the care of the tired and fractious Southerner to Buck and JD.
"Here... he's all yours... maybe you can get 'im calmed down, 'cause nothin' we've done has worked," Nathan announced as he wiped the spilled tea off his hands and arms and Chris mopped it off his pants.
Buck immediately moved to the bed and into Ezra's arms, wincing as the smaller man's splints dug into his back. He scowled up at the other two men, and demanded to know what the hell they had done to his Little One.
Nathan just stared at him, his mouth hanging open in shock. "What we did?! You're kiddin' right?"
JD pushed past them to join Buck and Ezra on the bed, rubbing the gambler's back and frowning as he felt him trembling beneath his hand. He reached out and pulled the blanket up off the bed, wrapping it tightly around Ezra before adding his indignant comments to Buck's. "Yeah... he's freezin'... how come ya got him sittin' here in the cold instead of tucked in the bed where he belongs?"
Chris saw the vein in Nathan's temple begin to throb as he gaped at the three men on the bed, his mouth opening and closing as he struggled to express his outrage at the ungrateful treatment he and Chris were receiving. "Why, you... you..."
Pulling gently on the healer's arm, Chris moved him toward the door. "Come on, Nathan... I think we deserve a drink after that... I'm buyin'." He had no idea how it had happened and at that point, he didn't really care. All he did know was that Buck and JD seemed to finally be back together... and Lit'l Ezra was back in Buck's arms where he belonged. And that was good enough for him.
"But they... we..." Nathan was still sputtering as Chris pulled him out the door and shut it quietly behind them. The healer turned on the man in black once they were outside, demanding to know how he could let them get away with that.
Chris merely turned him so he could see in the window. "Hush up and look."
Nathan scowled at him for a moment before doing as he asked. Staring in through the window, he finally realized what had happened. By some miracle, the dissension that had torn the three brothers apart had finally been resolved. A smile spread across his handsome dark face as he watched the three of them huddled together on the bed. Ezra was perched on the edge of the bed between Buck and JD, and was chattering away as his two big brothers petted and fussed over him. "Now how the hell did that happen?"
Chris slapped Nathan on the back and laughed softly. "It's Christmas, Nathan... a time for miracles. Come on, let's go get that drink. I don't know about you, but I need one."
Nathan took one last look at the three men in his clinic and shaking his head, followed Chris down the stairs and out into the street.
They met Josiah and Vin coming out of the alley leading from the livery, and stopped to see how they'd made out. The sharpshooter was carrying the bundle of clothes Buck had dropped in the alley, and started towards the clinic with them.
Chris laid a hand on his arm and stopped him. "That can wait for a bit. We've got a family reunion of sorts goin' on up there... let's go have a drink and let them have some time alone."
Vin and Josiah looked at each other in confusion, but allowed Chris and Nathan to steer them towards the saloon. "We'll explain everything once we get a few drinks in us. It's been a long day, and I think we all could use a break."
As soon as Buck and JD had gotten Ezra convinced that they weren't mad at him, and that they had no intentions of leaving him alone again, they managed to get him to drink what was left of the tea. While they waited for the tea to take effect, Buck had had JD run over to the saloon and grab some soup and a couple of biscuits for the gambler... he never had gotten any supper, since it had been left with Buck's bundle of clothes in the alley.
Ezra ate slowly and carefully, his eyes rarely straying from the bowl of soup Buck held for him. He was determined to get through this meal without spilling anything on himself for a change. Buck had wanted to feed him, knowing how tired he was getting, but the younger man obstinately refused... the only help he accepted was JD's. After every few spoonfuls of soup, the boy raised a biscuit to the gambler's mouth so he could take a bite... and even that Ezra managed to consume without dropping a crumb. When he finally finished, he inspected the towel Buck had tucked under his chin and grinned at the two men, proud beyond belief that there wasn't a spot of food anywhere on it.
"Will ya look at that, JD? He ate that whole bowl an' didn't spill a drop... not even Nathan could do that good!" Buck took the towel and wiped Ezra's mouth for him, enjoying the smile that seemed to stretch from one ear to another.
"Heck, Buck... even Chris couldn't a done as good as our little brother here did." JD ruffled Ezra's hair affectionately and watched the emerald green eyes widen at his words.
"I'm yourw w'ittle bwuvver now?" Ezra's head swiveled to look at Buck. "Am I, Buck?"
Buck grinned at JD and slipped an arm around Ezra, hugging him tight. "You bet ya are, little pard... you're now the proud owner of six big brothers... what d'ya think of that?"
They didn't think it was possible, but Ezra's smile got even wider as he took in the fact that he actually belonged to a real family now. Buck watched with amusement as the smile turned into a yawn, and realized the tea was finally taking hold and it was time to get him settled in the bed.
"Okay, pard... looks like it's your bedtime. How 'bout ya lean over against JD there an' let me get these blankets turned down for ya." Buck felt him press back against him slightly as he turned to stare at the boy. He'd noticed that the whole time they'd sat there talking, Ezra had taken great care not to touch or get too close to JD. It was almost as if he sensed that it made the young peacekeeper uncomfortable.
JD looked at Buck, who nodded encouragingly at him... and then reached out to tug gently at Ezra's sleeve. "It's okay, little guy... I don't mind."
Ezra looked up at Buck, and then slowly inched over to JD and leaned carefully back against him. JD hesitated for a second and then, deciding it didn't feel so strange after all, wrapped his arms around the Southerner and gave him a little hug. "You okay?"
Ezra nodded and turned to look back at JD. "Arwe you?"
JD smiled and pressed his forehead lightly against Ezra's. "Yeah... I think we're both gonna be okay."
Buck felt a huge weight lift from his shoulders as he watched the two young men finally come together. He knew JD and his big heart wouldn't be able to resist Lit'l Ezra once he finally gave him a chance.
"Okay, pard... let's get ya tucked in here." Buck reached to help Ezra lay back on the bed, but stopped when he saw his face fall.
"Arwen't you gonna w'ay down wif me, Buck?" Ezra's voice quivered, and he gave the ladies man a look that was impossible to refuse.
Buck looked helplessly at JD, who just smiled and got up off the bed. "Yeah, why don't you curl up with our little brother here and get some shut-eye, Buck... I'm about ready to head home anyway. Gotta lot to do tomorrow to get ready for Christmas." He smiled down at Ezra, who just shrugged and looked away.
Buck knew Ezra still wasn't ready to accept the idea of what a real Christmas could be like... was, in fact, sure this would be just like the last one. But he'd never had six brothers before who were determined to show him what Christmas was really all about.
Buck grinned at JD, who grinned right back and nodded. Neither of them could wait to see Ezra's face on Christmas morning... he'd finally get to know what it was like to be a normal little boy... with a family who loved him.
Buck pulled off his boots and climbed in the bed, and with JD's help, got Ezra settled in against him. JD pulled the blankets up over them and then after a moment's hesitation, ran his hand lightly over the gambler's head, smoothing his hair back. "I'll be back to see ya tomorrow, okay? Maybe we can play cards or somethin'."
Ezra smiled up at JD and slowly raised his arms, gazing hopefully into the younger man's brown eyes.
"You want a hug?" JD didn't even hesitate this time, he leaned over and let Ezra wrap his arms tightly around his neck, smiling as the older man whispered in his ear.
"F'ank you, JD." His voice was so soft, JD almost didn't catch it.
"For what, Ezra?" JD pressed his face against Ezra's cheek and whispered back.
"For bein' my frwiend." Ezra gave the young man a brief hug and then released him, snuggling against Buck as JD straightened back up.
"I'll always be your friend, Ezra... promise. Now you get some sleep." JD patted the Southerner's shoulder and headed for the door, turning back suddenly just as he reached it to give Ezra a friendly piece of advice. "Here's a tip, little brother... when Buck starts to snore?... just give him a good poke in the ribs and he'll stop. Wouldn't want him keepin' you awake all night with that God awful racket he makes."
JD opened the door and allowed a huge smile to spread across his face as Buck's laughing words of protest and Ezra's soft giggles, followed him out into the night.
Vin looked up as JD came into the saloon and shoved the chair next to him out as the boy approached their table. The others all mumbled words of greeting and smiled as JD gratefully sank down into the chair after grabbing his usual mug of milk from Inez.
"Y'all get Ezra to drink any of that tea?" Nathan asked, sipping on the whiskey Chris had just poured for all of them. He was glad to see a smile on the Kid's face... it was a big improvement over the scowl that had seemed to permanently taken up residence there.
"Yeah, he settled right down once he found out we weren't mad at him. Drank the tea, ate a whole bowl of soup... without spilling a single drop, I might add... and even managed to get down two biscuits." JD was almost as proud as Ezra had been over his accomplishments. "Now he's snuggled down in the bed with Buck." JD grinned as he thought about how Ezra had kept the ladies man there with just that one pitiful look. He really had him wrapped right around his little finger. "You know, Buck's love life is really gonna suffer as long as Lit'l Ezra's here to visit. The ladies in town are gonna wonder what the heck happened to 'im."
"Do 'im good to give it a rest for awhile... gives the rest of us a chance once the women find out Buck's not available." The others laughed at the huge grin that spread over Josiah's face as he discussed their womanizing friend's tendency to monopolize the female population of Four Corners.
Chris was studying the change in their youngest member's demeanor... relieved to see that the emotional confusion that had seemed to grip him since Ezra's accident finally seemed to be resolved. He decided it might be best to not mention it, and turned the conversation to the planned festivities for Lit'l Ezra's Christmas. "So does everyone know what they've gotta do tomorrow?"
JD looked at the others, not sure what Chris was talking about. And then it dawned on him it was the Christmas celebration they were planning for Ezra, and he blushed slightly and hung his head. He should have been in on it, but he'd been too busy feelin' sorry for himself to take an interest.
Josiah saw the boy's embarrassment and put a gentle hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly. "It's okay, JD... you're here now, ready to help, and that's all that matters. And together we're going to put on a hell of a celebration for our little brother!"
JD shot Josiah a look of thanks and joined in the finalization of the plans, agreeing gratefully when Vin suggested he accompany him on the trip up into the mountains to find the perfect tree. Chris was going out to hunt down the biggest turkey he could find and would be bringing it back to Mary and Inez. They had generously offered to prepare a traditional Christmas dinner and deliver it to the clinic before going to the church for the town's celebration. Nathan and Josiah would be at the church making decorations for the clinic and the tree, and Buck would be keeping Ezra entertained as usual.
Once they had everything set, Josiah leaned forward and offered his glass up for a toast. "To our Lit'l Ezra and his first Christmas."
Buck had finally gotten Ezra to quit giggling, and had him tucked in snugly beside him when the questions started.
"Buck? JD's not mad at me anymorwe, is he. He's my frwiend now." Ezra smiled as he thought about the hug that he'd gotten, and about JD calling him his little brother.
"He wasn't never mad at ya, pard... he just ain't never been around little kids much an' didn't know what to say to ya." Buck thought about JD and how close he'd come to losing his friendship. It would take time, but he was determined to make it up to the boy.
"Buck? What werwe you and Miwwie doin' when I found you?" Ezra heard Buck make a strange choking noise and rolled over onto his stomach so he could see his face. "You okay, Buck?"
Buck nodded as Ezra patted his face worriedly. The ladies man frantically searched for an answer that would satisfy the younger man and forestall anymore questions. "Um... we were just talkin', pard... that's all. I'm sorry I didn't get back to the clinic quicker, but-"
But Ezra wasn't going to be sidetracked that easily. "I know you arwe, Buck... you tol' me d'at aw'w'eady. You didn't w'ook w'ike you werwe talkin'... and I didn't hearw you talkin'... you sounded w'ike you werwe huwt."
Buck tried to convince him they were just talking, but Ezra just barreled on, barely taking time to breathe. "Did she huwt you, Buck? I was w'eawy mad 'cause I f'ought she was huwtin' you. I wouldn't w'et anybody huwt you, Buck... was she-"
Finally losing his patience, Buck reached up and placed a quieting hand over Ezra's mouth, effectively stopping the constant flow of words. "Lord, boy... hush a minute, will ya? Take a breath an' give me a chance to answer ya!"
Ezra's emerald eyes widened as he stared back at Buck, surprised by his friend's move. He finally nodded and the older man removed his hand slowly, ready to put it back if the stream of words started again. But Ezra merely looked contritely at Buck and whispered, "I'm sowwy, Buck. I'll be quiet now."
"That's okay, little guy." Buck smiled at the gambler to let him know he wasn't mad. "I'll make a deal with ya... I'll tell ya what Millie an' I were really doin' in that alley if ya promise me you'll lay down here an' go to sleep. Okay?"
"Okay, Buck... I pwomise... I'll go to s'weep." Ezra waited expectantly, watching Buck's face redden slightly as he cleared his throat and finally spoke.
"Um... well, little guy... we were... um... kissin'." Buck watched as Ezra's eyes widened and his face scrunched up, just as it did when he'd had a big drink of one of Nathan's awful concoctions.
"Eeewww... you kissed a girwl?" Ezra's hand wiped at his own mouth as if it was he instead of Buck who had performed the evil deed. "Does it huwt to kiss a girwl?"
Buck couldn't help but smile at Ezra's typical five year old's reaction to kissing. "No, it doesn't hurt... it actually feels pretty nice."
"But I hearwd you, Buck... you werwe makin' d'at moanin' sound d'at people make when d'ey'rwe huwt." Ezra watched Buck's face draw down in a frown and realized he'd forgotten about his promise. He apologized as he nestled back down in the bed, tucking himself under the larger man's arm and laying his head on the broad chest. "I'm sowwy, Buck... I'm goin' to s'weep now."
Buck chuckled at the contrite tone of Ezra's voice, and hugged him before tucking the blankets back up around him. "That's a good boy. Now let's get to sleep before Nathan comes to check on us an' sees we're still awake... we sure don't wanna do anything to get 'im mad at us, do we?"
Receiving no answer from the younger man, Buck assumed he was finally drifting off, and reached to turn the lamp down. But just as his fingers closed on the knob, he felt Ezra's slender body shudder.
"Ezra? Ya okay?" Buck pulled his hand slowly back from the lamp. He'd gotten no answer from the gambler, just another shudder and an almost inaudible whimper. "Ezra? Answer me, little guy."
"Buck? Why werwe d'ose men so mean to me? I didn't do nuffin' to d'em." Ezra's voice was barely a whisper, and shook with the remembered fear of being in the hands of his drunken attackers earlier.
Buck's heart fell. He'd thought that Ezra was handling the earlier confrontation okay, but apparently he wasn't. He could only imagine how terrifying the whole incident must have been to Ezra in his present condition. "They were just drunk, pard... they didn't know what they were doin'."
"I... I was so sc-scarwed. It was j-jus' w'ike bein' at Unca M-Maffew's again." Ezra's breaths were short and choppy as he fought against his tears again. He knew this was why his mama was coming... because they had gotten tired of his crying and being bad and told her to come and get him. Ezra paused for a moment, and then softly whispered, "Y'all tol' Mama to come and take me back d'erwe, didn't you?"
Buck pushed himself back up against the headboard and lowered his hand to the Southerner's arm, gently tugging on it. "Sit up here, Little One." He'd known it was coming... he just hadn't realized that that's what was really wrong with Ezra now. He knew the minute Ezra found out that his mama was coming to try and take him home, he would immediately assume they had sent for her. Mistrust had been ground into him for too long for him not to make that assumption.
Ezra let Buck help him get turned around until he was sitting cross-legged in the bed, facing him... but he refused to look at him. He kept his head turned down, afraid to let Buck see the tears that were filling his eyes again.
Buck stared at the smaller man. They'd known it would be hard to win Lit'l Ezra's trust... no one had ever kept their promise to him before, so why would he think it could possibly happen now. But Buck had had no idea it would be this hard. Every tear shed, every spilled crumb of food, every little thing he'd been told was wrong his whole life... all this left Ezra certain he would be sent away. No matter how much they promised him he was going to be safe and happy from now on... he knew it could all be stripped away in an instant. After all, it always had been before.
"Look at me, Ezra... please?" Buck's heart contracted when he saw the incredible pain etched into the gambler's face. If it was this bad for him at the age of five... what must the adult Ezra be feeling every time he was convinced he was about to be told to leave. It had to be a hundred times worse for him now. Buck reached out and gently ran his fingers over the angry bruise that marred the younger man's handsome features.
The tender touch was all it took... the tears that had been gathering in the thick, dark lashes slowly spilled over and slid down Ezra's cheeks. "I'm sowwy I wasn't good enough, Buck... I trwied... I w'eawy did." The soft southern drawl was filled with defeat... and an infinite sadness that tore at Buck's heart.
Buck cupped Ezra's face in his hands, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. He stared into the gambler's eyes and wished he knew the words that would make it all better for him... that would prove to him things were different now... that they were different. "I swear to ya that we didn't ask her to come an' get ya, Ezra... I swear it. What's it gonna take to convince you? Please, Little One... tell me what we have to do to show ya that we ain't like all the others who broke their promises to ya."
Ezra stared at Buck for a moment before whispering two simple words. "Wuv me."
Buck saw a slight movement out of the corner of his eye, and tore his incredulous gaze away from Ezra for a second. Chris stood just inside the door. He'd never even heard the black-clad gunslinger enter the clinic... had no idea how long he'd been standing there... but from the look on his face, Buck knew he'd been there long enough to hear Ezra's whispered plea.
Turning his attention back to the smaller man sitting on the bed in front of him, Buck moved his shaking hands down to gently stroke the gambler's arms. "That's it, Ezra? That's all it would take... just to love you?"
Ezra nodded slowly. "If you wuv somebody, you neverw would bweak yourw pwomises to d'em, would you? Not even if d'ey couldn't aw'ways be good?"
"Not even then." Buck agreed.
"No one's everw wuvved me w'ike d'at." The despair in Ezra's voice finally broke Chris's silence.
"Not even your mama, Ezra?" Chris moved slowly across the room and sat beside the two men on the bed.
Ezra looked up as Chris spoke and shook his head, waiting til the older man had settled on the bed with them before answering him. "She tol' me I was bad... d'at no one would everw wuv someone w'ike me. D'en she took me to Unca Maffew's... it was Chwistmas an' he didn't want me d'erwe, but she tol' him she didn't want me eiverw, an' she jus' w'eft me d'erwe anyway."
"Why did she do that, Ezra? Did you do something to make her mad?" Chris reached out and took his hand, gently rubbing his thumb across the back of it... just wanting to add his touch to Buck's to try and ease Ezra's pain.
Ezra nodded. "She was twyin' to w'un a con on a pweacherw. She wanted me to w'ie and tewll him d'at we didn't have any food, orw a pwace to w'ive so d'at he would give us money." Ezra turned anguished eyes up to Buck and started to cry again. "Pwease don't tewll Josiah, Buck... he'll hate me if he knows."
"No he wouldn't, Little One... Josiah could never hate you. He loves ya... just like the rest of us do." Buck watched as his words registered in Ezra's mind. A look of wonder and hope swept across the Southerner's face.
"You... you wuv me?" Ezra's voice shook uncontrollably as he whispered the words... wanting to believe, but at the same time afraid to.
Buck wrapped his arms around the young gambler and pulled him into a tight hug. Bending his head and pressing his cheek against the silky, chestnut hair, he whispered in Ezra's ear. "You're our Little One... our little brother. We love ya, Ezra... and nothin' ya do is gonna change that."
Chris gently rubbed Ezra's back as he leaned down to look into the watery green eyes, and watched as his words erased the last shred of doubt that flickered in their depths. "We're your family now Ezra, and this is your home... and you'll never have to leave unless you want to."
"I don't everw want to w'eave herwe, Chwis... not everw." Ezra clung to Buck as if he'd never let go, which seemed to suit Buck just fine.
Chris ran his hand lightly over Ezra's head and gave Buck's shoulder a tight squeeze before turning and heading for the door. "I'll see you two in the morning... try and get some sleep."
Buck nodded and smiled as he saw Chris take one last look back at the gambler before slipping back out into the night. Ezra had them all now... all six of them had fallen under his spell and would do anything to keep him with them. Maude could bring a dozen lawyers, and it wouldn't change a thing as far as they were concerned... nobody was taking their little brother away from them. Not now, not ever.
"You okay now, Ezra?" Buck felt the younger man nod, but his grip around Buck's neck didn't ease any... and the ladies man had no intentions of letting go of him until he was ready.
"Buck?" Ezra's childlike lisp was soft and sweet against Buck's ear.
"What, pard?" Buck could feel Ezra's body relaxing against him, and knew he was falling asleep.
"Will you take carwe of me til I grwow up?" The Southerner's words were slurred as he drifted further into sleep.
Buck felt tears well up in his eyes as he thought about how long it might be before that happened... it could be tomorrow... it could be never. Not that it mattered... he knew he'd be there for Ezra for however long he needed him. "You bet I will, Ezra. We all will."
And with Ezra's last words before falling asleep, Buck's tears began to fall. It was just a soft whisper... just three tiny little words mumbled sleepily against his neck... but it made the older man's heart swell until he thought it would burst from his chest.
"Wuv you, Buck." Ezra sighed and went limp in Buck's arms as his exhaustion finally won out.
After reaching over and turning down the lamp, Buck eased himself back on the bed and pulled the gambler carefully down with him. He dragged the blankets back over them, and closed his eyes before finally finding the strength to whisper in Ezra's ear. "I love you too, Little One. More than I ever thought possible."