A
Guide's Prerogative
A
companion piece to Megan's Mission
October 29, 2003
Okay, I hadn't intended to do this story. Blair is supposed to be busy at the Academy. But suddenly there he was insisting on his own fair share of time. I think this thing with Megan really bothered him.
Spoilers: This series falls into my Sentinel Universe. You don't have to read the others, but it might help. There is a slight reference to Joined Soul and Body.
Disclaimers: ?? I really don't know what you mean. Oh, all right.
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I'm beginning to worry about Jim. I thought he would be fine for the few weeks I'd be at the Academy, but then the brass pulled that stupid stunt and yanked my ride along credentials. Thank goodness Simon got them to reconsider, but that still leaves Jim at the hand of amateurs most of the time.
I'm probably blowing this way out of proportion. I mean, Jim's a grown man, and he has a pretty good handle on his senses. It's not like he hasn't worked without me in the past and done just fine. But I worry now, more than before. I'm not sure why.
It may have to do with our bond. It's ever so much stronger now than it was before the dis fiasco. I can sometimes feel his emotions through it. Just the really strong ones. Frustration is what I get most often these days.
His first week was with Simon and they did pretty well, although I got an earful from Simon about how Jim must surely be the bigger trouble magnet. Sounds like they had a full week. Jim didn’t say much when I got home in the evenings. He mainly wanted to hear about my day.
Even the zone-out he did have seemed pretty unavoidable to me. I might have noticed it sooner, but probably wouldn't have been able to prevent it. Poor Simon. He felt so bad. I'm gonna have to get onto H about that stupid screen saver though.
The weird thing was that Jim asked to bond that night. I think he was a little stressed and truthfully, I needed the confirmation of our partnership myself.
Rafe's week was a little quieter, but the caseload seemed more frustrating. The first pharmacy thefts started that weekend and Jim and Rafe got the assignment. Rafe did a great job keeping Jim grounded. Nary a zone in sight. But they didn't make any headway on the case.
Jim and I had three bonding sessions that week.
See why I'm worried?
Megan started her week with Jim on Monday. I must admit to feeling a twinge of something. Of course I shook it off. Megan's great and has more experience dealing with Jim's abilities than anyone but Simon. I have nothing to be worried about.
Jim came home last night and practically pulled me straight into bonding. I didn’t get much information through the bond, just a lot of raw undirected emotion. Afterward he fell asleep with his head in my lap and one hand grasping my wrist.
He left the loft reluctantly this morning and my day was not fun. I was twitchy and couldn't concentrate on anything.
Jim called midmorning and asked if we could have Megan over for dinner tonight. My first instinct was to say no. When he said her name, I got goose bumps all over. Jim explained that there was something Sentinel related that we all three needed to discuss, so I gave in.
I can't understand why I'm feeling this way. Megan is our friend, and truthfully, I've always had a bit of a thing for her. But for some reason, I really don't want her in my space right now.
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Jim's home. The door opens and I can sense my partner's presence. How weird is that coming from the non-talented party in this relationship. My skin crawls and I know when Megan enters the room as well.
I give Jim a welcoming smile and look past him to greet Megan. Her smile falters a bit as our eyes meet. Shake it off, Sandburg, she's your friend.
"Hi, Megan. Glad you could come over. It sounds like Jim's been giving you a hard time." I grin at Jim as he taps me on the back of the head.
Jim smiles indulgently and steals a piece of celery from the chopping block.
"Ah, it's not so bad, Sandy. I think we've actually figured out the problem. We just needed to talk to you about it, right, Jimbo?"
My Sentinel nods. "What say we wait til after dinner to talk shop, okay?" He seems a bit reluctant to discuss the whole thing.
"Right," I say recognizing Jim's tone. "Megan, have a seat and make yourself at home. You want a beer?"
"Sure, mate." She sits on the couch and turns so that she can see into the kitchen. Jim hands her a bottle and rejoins me in the kitchen.
"What do you need me to do, Chief?" he asks laying a hand on my shoulder and giving it a brief squeeze.
I have him check the oven to see if the chicken is done. Jim is hovering and I keep catching Megan watching us. She seems lost in thought. Jim and I banter back and forth as usual, but my heart's not in it.
What is Megan thinking? Why is her mere presence setting off all my alarms? I wonder what's been happening at work that has Jim and Megan concerned enough to call a conference. Has Jim been zoning? Maybe his senses are spiking. Damn. I hate this. I hate not being able to be there for him. I hate having to let someone else do my job.
Somehow we've managed to set the table and finish making dinner without really saying anything. Megan is still lost in thought.
"Dinner's served, Megan. Come and get it." She doesn't seem to have heard me. "Megan?" I look at Jim who just shrugs. "Megan?" I call louder a little concerned. She finally looks at me. "Dinner's ready."
Megan nods and goes to the bathroom to wash up. When she returns, we eat and make small talk, mostly discussing my classes at the Academy. Megan's very interested in the classes and tells us about some of the training she received in Australia.
When we finish eating and clearing the dishes I grab fresh beer for everyone and we get comfortable in the living room.
Megan sits on the love seat while Jim and I share the couch.
"Okay," I start, "are you two ready to talk about whatever is bothering you?"
Megan and Jim look at each other, Megan raises a questioning eyebrow at Jim.
"Chief, do you remember when we talked about how Megan might be a Guide?"
My stomach does a flip-flop. "Yeah."
"Well," Jim continued reluctantly. "I think you were right. When she works with me, it's a lot easier than with any of the others. But it's making me a little uncomfortable feeling so comfortable with Megan." Jim fidgeted and refused to look at either of us.
Megan's watching me. I manage to school my expression. I've learned from watching stone-face Ellison. I can't trust my emotions right now. How can I explain what I'm feeling when I don't even know.
"Why do you feel uncomfortable with Megan Guiding you, Jim?" I asked quietly, trying to keep my emotions in check.
Jim met my gaze and I get lost in his eyes.
"You're my Guide. I don't want to work with anyone else. It's not right."
Suddenly everything was okay. The pressure around my heart eased and whatever I was feeling about Megan didn't matter any more. My Sentinel, my Sentinel trusted me and wanted to be with me, not any other Guide. Relief, joy, and love filled my heart. And I could see the same emotions mirrored in Jim's eyes.
After several seconds that seemed an eternity, I turned to Megan. "I trust you to help Jim while I'm unavailable Megan." I looked back at Jim. He saw that everything would be all right and nodded his acceptance.
Silence filled the loft. Megan stared at us, then chugged the last of her beer and cleared her throat.
"Let's talk about this pharmacy case then. Jim keeps picking up a smell that he can't identify."
We spent another hour on that and then Jim drove Megan home.
I spent the time alone meditating. Megan is a Guide. I realize that now. I also understand. I finally understand how Jim felt when I was helping Alex. I didn't think I was capable of feeling that kind of deep jealousy. But when I saw Megan this evening, I could have ripped her head off.
Okay, maybe not, but my gut clenched and I felt a growl deep in my throat. I didn't want her near Jim. Near my Sentinel. And I thought Jim was possessive! Man is he going to get a laugh out of this. I'm ready, when he gets home I know he'll need to bond as badly as I do. I get the feeling we'll be bonding frequently this week. But that's okay. It will just strengthen our partnership.
I think even Megan could sense how strong we are. I should probably apologize, but then again, I think she understands. I wonder if there's a Sentinel out there for Megan? I hope so. She'd make a great Guide. For someone else.
Finis.
Comments are always welcome, please let me know what you think. Judy